Camp NaNoWriMO FINAL DAY (Butlins Damn you)

Ticket Winnings:Its for my little brother

Today is the last Day of Camp NaNoWriMo, isn't it so sad? Especially if you still haven't finish your novel and have over two thousand words to go.
As I said I was on holiday last week, which was "FUN". Okay, it wasn't that bad, I had all right time and won all this cool stuff (That Youtube won't let me share with you) from the arcade . I'm not sure if I have that much to say about the holiday, it wasn't one of those full of adventure and experiences. I did get tipsy for the first time and realise that alcohol is boring. No interest in it at all. Though, I'm sure my siblings will have something to say about that.

This was murder to get(from a2p machine)

Notepads double as  photo/sibling shields

As for the writing, that was a challenge. I did write during the first few nights and in the car journey down. I actually wrote while we at this disco/show thing. So was kinda good considering, though I was still terribly behind when I got on home at 5 am last Monday. I'm not saying what my current word count is, but I will say its not finish and I don't think it will be until next week.

Other thing that happen to me this week is, that I officially left school yesterday. Really it was me signing out, because you need to or you're officially remain in High School forever which is a lot bullshit. I think they do it to mess with us.
I've actually been avoiding doing it for some time, after 5th June since it just sound so awkward and it really was.

It be the last night I'll get to wandered around CDHS, unless I become a teacher or a parent like my mum, Who tag along to my signing fun, which involved going to each of my teacher's this year and getting them to sign a bit of paper saying that I currently haven't stole, er borrowed anything without returning it. Jokes on them, I still have a textbook which I have no intentions of returning and the teacher already signed my form *evil laugh insert here*.

I chit chatted with most of my teachers when I saw them, I actually was part of a one sided conversation with my maths teacher from SG. Who was obsessed with the notion of taking over the world as being a career choice and money being the main motive. I should have told him I was going to be studying an art subject at college and I don't see much money in my near future.

All my teachers, except for my art teacher who signed the form and I just left straight after, have been left with the impression that I'm going to become a writer. This mostly due my mum saying I'm going to be a "Famous Author" to my Maths and Biology teacher. My English teacher praised my writing and asked if I had ever tried/thought about to get any my stories published, I say no since I had nothing in my opinion that is publishable yet. She said my writing was good (though to my knowledge she only read my one or two of my stories) and should try to get published. She said to tell her/the school if I ever I do.

Oh, I already I have that fantasy of going back to shove my achievement in the supports' faces. I would just like say this comes from a small, bitter place inside me who feels confident about my writing. Unlike the rest of me who finds fault in most of it. Though seriously, if I ever did get published, I would offer the school a copy of my book for the library. It such a small town, that if/when I get a book with my name it on a shelve it would probably spread like fire. Maybe not, but I don't think it be some secret.

Maybe I'll be the only notable student on the school Wikipedia someday, LOL. Also To celebrate leaving school officially, I bought Playdough (well, my mum actually paid for it). Yeah, I got a toy for toddlers. Its the artist in me that wanted it.

Well that all for this week, I'm going to T-in-The-Park next week for the first time (Exciting and scary), so it be another pre-written post next week. Not sure yet what it'll be about. I know Dinosaurs.
I'm off to jump in the dark now, thanks for reading.

Why studying English isn't for all book lovers

While I'm out of the country (once again, I'm actually in England which currently is technically not another country, but it is) and no guaranteed internet, I leave you with my reflection of the topic of doing a degree in English.

This was something I truly thought about doing, I actually got a conditional from University of Dundee to do Psychology/English, so why I am not at Dundee? (Mainly because it summer, really) Because I knew I won't get the grades to do it and was correct. Still felt horrible when I pressed the decline button on UCAS track. I failed all my subjects except for that lousy B in Art. This year I thought about applying to do English again, but realised Dundee was only place that would take me. It was only place I wanted to go anyway, but Art was also calling. Yeah and we know how that turned out.

I love books, I truly do, I love writing, I even love how complex the English Language can be, but there something about studying the art subjects that destroys them. This is also referring once again to my horrible art experience, by the time I was kicked out of Art I was ready to throw out all my pencils and burned all that remained of all the pieces I did for it. Part of me, still wants to burn that blue butterfly, even though it took me months and worked out petty good.


Back to English, I think tearing apart books can ruin them, I quite enjoyed reading 'How to kill a Mockingbird'. However, I remember after studying it I never wanted to see or hear about it again. Three years later, I don't feel the same. Still probably won't reread it. Three times was enough.

Loving books doesn't automatic make you good at understanding their deeper meanings. I mean, I have got better at this, when reading great work of literature. I'm probably far better than I was a year ago. Also sometimes they just don't have some great meaning, sometimes they just great reads. Though, most of my favourites do have that deep meaning.

Another big factor with Studying English, is that there no real path afterwards. Most need further training afterwards. I know, that I would probably do anything to avoid a proper office job. That's why science currently my favourite pathway.

My main issue with English is that I'm Dyslexic and I've only been reading for eight years and most Universities are not willing to cut you any slack for this. I probably couldn't get into any Uni in Scotland but Dundee (why do St. Andy want French?)  Its a great Uni so who really cares.

Its funny, in all the different course I thought about applying to I always end up at Uni of Dundee.

Okay, this wasn't that detailed, but mainly dealt with the reasons it wasn't right for me.

Dreams are my friends (But not Fate's)

Hi losers, due to parking and writing for Camp NaNoWriMo, Oh and sleeping, did a lot of random sleeping today: been too busy to write my blog (or any writing today). So based on my sleeping (three separate times did I fall asleep today), I'm choosing to share with you lot, the excepts of some of the dream scenes in my Camp novel. These are all from the point of my MC Fate (No, not that Fate). These are basically my favourites.

Dream One: 

 I stare across the bridge, fear fills me, a black mass of smoke is all I can see. It moves swiftly towards me, I want to run. I can’t. I can move, but I can’t leave them. Who are they? I turn to my right, I can see a figure next me. I can tell it female, but I can’t see any of the details of her face. She familiar, I know her well. It’s a new friendship, but strong. I turn to smoke; it getting closer. I step away from it. I feel something grasp my left hand. I instantly look to the hand; I see two figures in front of me. They are distorted, the smoke consuming them. Suddenly, a piercing blue light reaches from the smoke. I realise they’re his eyes. My heart swells as I look into them. I breathe in, the smoke finally finding me. 

Dream Two (I think): 

I stand in a forest unfamiliar to me, I can hear water running. I walk towards the sound. The ground is soft and my feet slip into the mud. They’re bare and I can feel the blown slush between my toes. I’m suddenly at the water; it’s a small lake, it’s really only the river expanding before narrowing again. I’m suddenly, waist deep in it. Its dark and I can’t even see any part of myself that is immerged. I duck under it, I keeping my eyes open. The water has become clear; the stones at the bottom of late appeared to sparkle. My eyes are drawn to speck of gold on a rock and I reach out for it. My hand finds it quickly. I realise it’s not a stone, it something coated in dirt. I begin to rub at it. Abruptly, the light disappears and darkness grips me, taking the breath away from me. It’s like a physical being is compressing my chest. I begin to panic I can’t get away, I try to move but can’t. All at once, I feel someone grab me, under my arms and I’m out of the water. I realise I’m naked, I don’t care. He turns me around; I catch his blue eyes as they fill with shock before he pulls me behind him. I look through his shoulders as the darkness leaps from the water. Its heading towards me, but it has to stop. Because of him.

“Leave Now,” he shouts at me. I’m filled with the knowledge of how to. I close my eyes, turning the 

darkness into blackness.

Dream I lost count:

I’m walking in a field; the yellow glass reaches up my waist. The sky was white with a pale orange tone to it. The world seemed overly bright. I see him in the certain of the field; he stands dark against the light of the sky. I feel a smile spread across my face. I see one spread across his. I walk calmly towards him, but my heart is skipping.

I reach him where he greets with open arms. I go into them, allowing him to hold me. Both our chests are bare; his skin feels hot against mine. We pull apart, but remain touching. His hands remain on my waist. I looked to the warm blue of his eyes, filled with love.

I put my hand flat against his chest, feeling his heat beat steadily. I feel an odd rumble and the area round my hand shins gold.

I stick my hand into his chest and pulled out a gold heart. He smiles at me and leans into kiss me.

If you want to find out if I finish this thing here my Camper Profile: http://campnanowrimo.org/campers/phoenixangel 

Also here the Utube channel where I have been posting Vlogs about this camp Experience: http://www.youtube.com/user/RachelVerna

Writing is hard! (Camp NaNoWriMo Week 1)

I was aware of this before, obviously otherwise I would have written that damn novel by now. Even when I'm on a roll, I'm still uncertain about where I'm actually heading with my writing. At this point, the idea of just writing plotless nonsense is becoming very appealing. However, I realise that be rather against my intentions/reasons of doing NaNoWriMo.

Maybe I do better once I've actually got my antagonist introduce to the novel, with the current plan he should be reveal middle way threw the novel, so around the 25,000 words point (well, If I stop at 50,000 words). 

I've also noticed that during my writing, that on the days I actually do something I write more, where as on days I lay about with no other purpose than to write I struggle to reach my goals. I suppose it proves that you should be doing other things besides just sitting about your room typing. If that what I actually need to do write, I could always tidy my room, organise my draws or draw petty ponies.


Also keep reading, so far I've been good and kept my New year resolutions (except for chocolate, its remains very much beside me). I think I'm going to try and read two books a week. We're just see.

The Writer's Version of Camping

Yesterday was the start of June, the Scottish weather is back to normal with the sun hiding; the midges have awoken and once more have began to slowly eat the Scottish population; Oh and the sun burn remains. So basically itching all the time and still being woke up from being too hot still.

Most importantly though, yesterday also meant the start of the first session of Camp NaNoWriMo (of the year); I'm just one of the many attempting this challenge. I've been wanting to do NaNoWriMo since I heard about it, which was about this time last year. I read about it creeping about the late Inkpop's forms. I didn't know about the Camp that year and sadly I was too busy to do it last November because I was basically failing an important subject which will remain nameless and failed.

In case, you're unaware of the concept of NaNoWriMo (if not skipped to the next paragraph ;]); it basically where you try to write 50000 words in 30 days or a month as 30 days is sometimes known. NaNoWriMo is officially in November and Camp NaNoWriMo just means you do it in the summer during June or August 

(or if you're like me; both).

I debated what idea to use for my month novel for the past few months before finally centrally on using idea that had been playing on my mind for years, since I was 15 to be precise. I had actually started writing this idea, but looking over it, it an example of how bad my writing used to be. The whole thing need to be rewritten and I've reshaped some vital points as well so far, such as when one of the important characters is
introduced. I actually first got the idea from a English Stand Grade Personal writing past paper. The idea was to write a short story to go with the Title "The Stranger". This will play an important part in novel, my original idea might even be expanded. We just see how it goes.

As for August book, will be a completely undone idea. I might use one of my old plans that never actually got around to using or my most recent ideas of a sort of Queen (the band) inspired novel or finally let that horror theme park of my dreams have full ran of my conscious mind. Still have two months to decided. I'm semi worried about this one, as I'll be starting College at the end of August *Gulps*.

So far I'm doing well and have a clear idea where "The Stranger" is going. I obviously need to write at least to write 1667 words a day to keep the goal, but my personal goal is at least 2000 words a day. In the one day, I've kept this goal. Obviously, I can't just go and abandoned my other goals and commitments.

Speaking of which, I have to finish this week's book and take care of a family book case that badly needs organising (something I've decided to do unprovoked).

 Wish me luck.
P.S. Heres my profile encase you're interested:  http://campnanowrimo.org/campers/phoenixangel