Saturday 28 March 2020

Life is Static

You're be shocked to know that much has not happened this week, including productive things.
No editing or creative writing. No filming.

My sibling got out of the hospital and is fine. She didn't have Covid-19. They were worried about her fast heartbeat but she not been sick again.

I'm been playing Animal Crossing, watching random things on Disney Plus. Watched Tiger King which is something and I can't believe no one brought that TV show. It would have made a great reality TV show. Probably because of the breeding tiger just have them be tourist trap for 12 weeks while they're cute and sort of harmless. So many questions are raised, but I don't like any one of the big players.

Animal Crossing does mean I've ended up going to bed at a decent time because it does get boring once you can't sell stuff after 10pm.

I have not heard back from the college and I don't know if I just should just assume that I'm not getting in, or that just everything is on hold till further notice. Getting funded would be difficult. Its gonna be stressful even if I do get it in now.

I was gonna buy bleach but my card for declined, due to fraud. HSBC doesn't have UK call centres during the best of times which means I can't their call centre employees and they can't understand me, which is why its a bad system.

So I said a payment was not me, but it was. I just didn't understand what the hell Kika was, but they were saying Sticki Club. The fauld was just ASDA rejecting me 60 times when I was trying to abendments through to my account before the ice cream sold out because I had already lost the puppy food.

I am worried. I am always worried. But hey at least I have a referal to a wait list now.

Saturday 21 March 2020

Animal Crossing Pandemic

Well, things are not going well as you can tell. Even in a pandemic bois and trump are once again in competition to see who can go down in history as the worst leader in the 21st century.

Also, my autoimmune depressed sibling is in hospital. She is being tested for Covid-19 just in case. She was sick three times in 24 hours and they can't risk so now she being given fluids and is staying overnight. Obviously, not great. Hopefully, she is out tomorrow. She was just going in to get her blood tested for other reasons than the virus of the hour.

I am tired and in pain, so normal. I woke up at 8.30 because I forgot to turn off my alarm that I set to make sure that I didn't miss the postman. I didn't. Anyway, I have a switch now and I played Animal Crossing as soon as I woke, till noon.  I have got a house and updated it. The museum and the store is being made tomorrow, without any time travelling.

I knew my audiobook listening would go up and I have finished two audiobooks so far lol. I had been listening to one of them before had but Animal Crossing pushed over that boring line. The other one was better.

Everything is up in the air and who knows what is gonna happen. Everyone has justified anxiety except the arseholes hoarding food and not isolating. This is definitely going to be something to look back on. I will have spent a majority of it obsessing over Animal Crossing and that is how all our mental health will survive. Seriously, what else I am meant to do when my mobile network goes done, meaning I have no means of contact to the outside window. My sibling said she got a warning about it, but I didn't. It was only half an hour but still not great when they don't tell you about it.

Hope for the best and what else can I personally do.

Wednesday 18 March 2020

Book Review: Watching You by Lisa Jewell

I started writing this at Christmas.


You’re back home after four years working abroad, a new husband in tow. 

You’re keen to find a place of your own. But for now you’re crashing in your big brother's spare bedroom. 

That's when you meet the man next door.

He’s the head teacher of the local high school. Twice your age. Extraordinarily attractive. You find yourself watching him. 
All the time. 

But you never dreamed that your innocent crush might become a deadly obsession. 

Or that someone is watching you.

This is the third novel by Lisa Jewell I have read and reviewed, Since She Been Gone is still pretty much my favourite but now I can see patterns in her works. Like Teenagers and Adults being on the same level, with kids tending to know more than adult characters. That's probably true of life as well.

There are a lot of unlikeable characters at play and people doing morally wrong things.

The setting of this book involves a group of rich people, living in fancy houses and lot of strained relationships.

There is Autism Rep in this book and makes me go okay. It's not terrible, maybe bad aspects to start
with, I wasn't sure where she was going with this character at the start. We do have a character that's probably socially stunted, perhaps more from the way he's being raised than being on the spectrum.  Jewell goes on that labels are a good thing so I can get behind it and the characters are involved with the plot. It's definitely on the better side of Autistic rep, and there's more than one character with it. It's more on the exampling side but makes sense with the plot.

Overall, I give this book 4/5 stars for Gate Locks. It's a decent thriller in a world with bloated failed shockers.

Read: 20/12/2019 to 22/12/2019
Reviewed: 26/12/2019 - 18/03/2020
Narrator/s: Gabrielle Glaister
Medium: Audiobook
Published Date: 12th July 2018
Publisher: Cornerstone Digital
Source: Library
Content Warning for Book: I'm not sure, but memory says: Death, Suicide,

Saturday 14 March 2020

Nothing or Over the limit.

I am once again sick. Don't worry, pretty sure it's not the hot virus of the year Covid-19. I'm sure because I got this cold from an Autoimmune depressed person, so they would be hella sick if it was the virus. Not much more I can about this mess, other than I hope it gets under control soon. Starting to worry they won't for a while.

I actually woke up with a sore throat on the day I had an interview about this college thing. Probably because this is the way of my body. I don't why I am the way I am. I mean Autism and anxiety have an effect, but I don't think it explains everything.

Even before the Interview, I was fucking up, so we had to write this review thing right. A thing I knew I would be asked to do when I applied, but then they specify favourite and used the word analysis so now I have never seen a film before and know nothing about being critical to any media.  It took me two days before the interview to decide I would write some shit about Scott Priglim Vs World. I like the Graphic Novel better, but I think that just comes from the limitation of film. I might just publish the writer's cut when I know my state of being. I had a limit of 500 words so of course, it ended up being almost 800 words without a conclusion, so I cut out a few paragraphs and just didn't write a conclusion to my nonsense. I mostly wrote about the film's mise-en-scene and how it's cool that it was actually completely filmed in its setting. One of the interviewers said it was good, but how much do you get from a glance. I guess he does grade a bunch of bullshit so maybe he has gotten good at doing it at speed. But not like he was gonna tell me it was terrible. They almost seemed to forget about the review but did ask right as the interview was wrapping up. But let's go back to the start.

I make the mistake of going to Wilkos at 3.20 to try and get pattern duck tape. It was a bust and I forgot completely that I wanted a universal remote for the TV in my living room. Its meant to be play DVDs but if you can't skip the ad for Step Up 3D, making it useless. Also turns out Scott Pilgrim is on Netflix anyway. It did have tons of toilet paper, but as I'm not a tool, so it was no use for me. I go to WHSmith to perchance they have the ducktape, but no, only Clearance Ghostbuster notebooks (which is one of my favourite live-action films, so who knows why I didn't think of it before) and Haribo.

I was with my sister so after that waste of time, I had to drive the 15 minutes to take her to the supermarket of choice so she can buy all the pot noodles. This meant that instead of being 15 minutes early, I was 7 minutes early. Not a big deal, but after going to reception I had to go into another building and make my way through a building with no map or signs to where the hell the stairs were. The elevator took forever to come and only went to the third floor. I need the fourth but I took it to the third on the hopes it would be easy to find my way. I end up being 3 minutes late and they are talking to someone anyway. So I sat down outside. Maybe I should have knocked and said I was there, but I didn't want to interrupt someone else interview.

They seem very confused when I said my name. I guess I could have been mumbled, I know I didn't respond typically to polite chit-chat like straight-up said nothing to how I am. I hate those questions anyway, its either 'fine' and the truth gets you weird looks. My throat was sore, that's my excuse. Not the Selective Mutism.

Which reminds me, I finally made it to the GP about this Anxiety thing. He said anti-anxiety drugs don't work, which not alarming to hear considering all the people on them. He referred me, so I'll probably hear about that in two years time when I get the will to go again about my chronic pain again.

There were two interviewers. They asked me the usual questions and I said some bullshit, like my strength being, have an eye for the frame and being good at editing. Lies if my half-arsed YouTube videos are anything to go by.

They asked what I wanted to do for in the future. I said my dream but I also like doing camera work. Didn't mention liking visual mixing, they must be only five of those jobs anymore outside of sports.

He straight up asked what I had been doing between high school and now, which now eight years of not doing much on paper. I told him about Visual Communication, but not the two years of uni. Though one of the lectures might straight-up being one of the randoms from uni who did one module, that was very badly taught. I had no idea what was going on with that module anyway. I might just re-summit the same pictures. Who would notice? I'll just dye my hair and I'm totally a different person.

I don't know what I think of the units. One of them is Animation based, which I kinda get if its to teach us Digital effects basics, otherwise what's the point of it. They will be some logic I'm sure. I guess I'll end up with another random animation. Maybe I could use an intro or something. Maybe I'll animate a skeleton like a punk.

I was asked about what I watched on YouTube, I said BookTube and nothing else. I could have said media analysis people who I do watch like Lindsey Ellis and that guy who just talks about Jurassic Park. I could only think of Drama video and tea channels that talk about people I don't know but its some reason interesting to see people's dirty laundry. I don't get celebrity gossip but YouTubers are so messy, just in public. Also, commentary channels are fun on weird tends of YouTube and social media. Internet humour is so weird and personal. YouTube leads to weird places.

They asked about games, and I said I like Point and Click games, which I do. I like puzzle, not shooter based games. I don't why I didn't mention the Sims, especially when I used to make films from the Sims 2. Sims 4 is trash compared to them all of the other ones, somehow even Sims 1 which no longer plays properly and looks like it made from literal cardboard. Couldn't age up kids but had rollercoasters.

I guess I'm a gamer. I own 3 consoles, but I just feel discontent due to not liking Shooters. I'm really gonna miss Flash. I mention Sam and Max, my OGs who probably explains some of my humour. I relate to Max the most and I know that is probably a bad thing. One of the interviews mention Monkey Island and my brain was like I've never played that when I have. Not the full series, but briefly the first and definitely the third one. Third one a lot.

I'm desperate for Animal Crossing: New Honzition to come out, that also escape my brain. I do know a lot of shit about video games because I love watching retro reviewers. I do watch decent people who put real effect into their videos. They have a YouTube module which I guess could be interesting.

They said they liked my choice in media: Sam & Max game, Nightmare on Elm Street 3, etc. Who knows what will happen. I'm just not choice.

My boiler is staying playing up. I, like a fool, I thought it had been fixed and was just wonky immediately after. But no, my house is freezing right now and I can't do my dishes.

I have started a project that involves me watching 40 films, I think I'm gonna start film Bullet Journal to document it. I'm starting this month in advance to when I would want to finish the project completely, but I'll probably end up watching more films because of it than I normally do. I will least have an impressive knowledge of early 90s films by the end of it.

I've left everything to get away from me, so excuse me as I panic film a video that somehow only five minutes long.

Wednesday 11 March 2020

Book Review: Eve of Man by Giovanna Fletcher & Tom Fletcher

Now I have POV by Mcfly suck in my head.

She survived against all odds. The first girl born in fifty years. They called her EVE.

On the first day, no one really noticed. All those babies wrapped in blue blankets--not a pink one in sight. On the third day, people were scared--a statistic-defying abundance of blue. Not just entire hospitals, not only entire countries, but the entire world. Boys. Only boys.

Until Eve. The only girl born in fifty years. The savior of mankind. Kept protected, towering above a ruined world under a glass dome of safety until she is ready to renew the human race.

But when the time comes to find a suitor, Eve and Bram--a young man whose job is to prepare Eve for this moment--begin to question the plan they've known all along. Eve doesn't only want safety, and she doesn't only want protection. She wants the truth. She wants freedom.

I wasn't sure about this novel going in, I am a fan of Mcfly and therefore Tom Fletcher, but not sure if songwriting translates to prose. This was another Sci-fi by people famous for things outside of their known writing mediums that I did like. It's not perfect but its decent first attempt at YA Prose.

This is another novel with a lack of females being born. This is always the way Dystopia go along, I've only come across one Dystopian st where all the males died out. Probably never going to be a thing since more women and fewer men have in the past been able to build up the population and Afitical sperm is apparently on the way. This one goes for girls just not being born anymore which brings up questions as to why.

LGBTQ+ people aren't really talked about, apparently, there are brief references that I missed. I had a moment where I thought wouldn't it be cool if there were a trans character, but no, just appears to be a cis boy pretending to be a girl and falling in love with eyes. This is the first book in a series so it might be explored more in the sequels. The two protagonists that have been sheltered in different ways and romantic relationships do seem not to be significant in this world anymore. It's interesting to think about what would Transness be like in a world like this, but it is probably best left for a trans writer to tackle anyway. Sexism and Toxic Masculinity are present in this world, so gender roles are there. I'm not sure what it's trying to say about them, it does seem to more about the power this company has over Eve and the other women with XX chromosome havers being so rare. It could be going somewhere with gender and sex. I could write an essay on this, however, it would more my own thoughts than what is actually present in this book. Best to move on to more of the actual text.

The audiobook has two narrators to match the POVs in this book. It works well. I do like and feel for the characters.

Overall, I give this book 4/5 stars for Rusty Metal. This is a near-future Dystopia and that will sadly never not be relvant. I think I will read the next in the series if I come across it. Anyway, I need to review my books as I read them.

Read: 6/6/2019 to 7/6/2019
Reviewed: 26/06/2019 - 16/03/2020
Narrator/s: Charlotte Ritchie and Josh Dylan
Medium: Audiobook
Published Date: 18th June 2019
Publisher: Listening Library
Source: Library
Content Warning for Book: I'm not sure, but memory says: Sexism; Sexual Assualt referenced; Child Abuse;

Saturday 7 March 2020

My Favourite Reviewer

You all be delighted to know that have been given an interview date. Next week so that's that post sorted. I have had clarification on something that makes it so much harder. Online it says to write a review on a film, so I have been thinking about it in the back of mind. However, on the letter that I got the mail, it says to analysis my favourite film or TV Programme, so obviously, now I have no favourite films or TV shows.

Seriously, all I can think of is Beauty and the Beast (1991) and wrote half analysis. I can talk about the mise-en-scene and the Hero's journey. A bit of Femaleist film theories.

Disney has actually gotten worst about female agency/ just having femme characters. Beauty and the Beast has four named female characters. The Little Mermaid technically wins with nine, but only has two that have anything to do with the plot, surrounded by the six toxic masculine characters that have major scenes in the film. Comedy relief is always male.

I generally suck sometimes at talking about why I like something, I can tell you when something is bad and why. When something works it works,

I have a million things to do and feel like crap because I finally washed my carpets over the last two days. The Carpet cleaner is really good, but it's heavy. It needed to be done because a certain puppy went through a phase of doing the toilet on the carpet rather than the mat for some reason in my house. Still not fully house trained, but he strictly does by the back door now. He did pee outside today which is something. Once summer full comes then its outside or nothing. He's already too old to be using mats.

I also tried the carpet cleaner on my mattress, because a certain other dog pees herself when she asleep. I don't why she does it. I thought it was linked to her being in heat but she dressed now so I don't know It seemed to work. It can be used on furniture but it said nothing about mattresses. Though, it does make me want to start a bit about how you should wash your mattress every month or something. My life hack is always have two mattress protectors if have one for a likely repeatable event.

I need to finished review thing for the Thursday, I need to edit a video for tomorrow and do captions for that. I want to write and get better planning with videos. My house is a state and I need to walk the Chaos Goblins more. I'm just really tried, also I like to read, have I been doing that.

I have decided to Self-published a project which I tweet about specifically say I could make own cover but would need an editor and got several desperate tweets offering cover making services. Desperate and illiterate, which is surprising as twitter is fully about reading and writing words.

Wednesday 4 March 2020

Only Mostly Devastated by Sophie Gonzales

Maybe my favourite film is Grease. No...Or is it? No.

Ollie and Will were a summer fling; now they're classmates. But only one of them is out...

It was the very last Wednesday of August when I realized Disney had been lying to me about Happily Ever Afters. Because, you see, I was four days into mine, and my prince was nowhere to be found.

"Please don't lose contact. I need to see you again," he'd said. So why was I here, banging my head against a metaphorical wall, weighing up the pros and cons of sending another message? This wasn't a big deal. It was just a guy texting another guy. A guy who knew all my biggest secrets, and had Seen. Me. Naked™. A guy who'd convinced me he really, really liked me. A guy who'd better have been abducted by goddamn aliens...

When Ollie meets Will over the summer break, he thinks he's found his Happily Ever After. But once summer's ended, Will stops texting him back, and Ollie finds himself short of his fairy-tale ending.

A family emergency sees Ollie uprooted and enrolled at a new school across the country - Will's school - and Ollie finds that the sweet, affectionate and comfortably queer guy he knew from summer isn't the same one attending Collinswood High. This Will is a class clown, a basketball jock and, well, a bit of a jerk.

Ollie isn't going to pine after a guy who isn't ready for a relationship. But as school life repeatedly throws them together, from music class to the lunch table, Ollie finds his resolve weakening.

With the noisy drama of their friends as the backdrop - from ambitious Juliette and frosty Lara, to big-hearted Darnell and king-jock Matt - Ollie has a decision to make.

The last time he gave Will his heart, Will handed it back to him trampled and battered. Ollie would have to be an idiot to trust him with it again. Right?

This was sold as a Queer Modern Retelling of Grease and it is. I think ten years ago, it probably would it been sold as High School Musical. Maybe that's just that the Love interest, Will is a basketball player. Oliver isn't a science quiz genius or anything. He does like music and is in a band. I guess basketball is just the modern equal of a bad boy car-obsessed gang. Yeah, that's not a thing anymore, probably because cars are not a novelty anymore.

I do like that we have Queer character outside the main romantic pairing. Queer people are friends with other Queer people even when we not out. We find each other completely on accident.

This novel is completely told in Oliver's POV, which I was slightly disappointed about, cause in my mind a Grease retelling should duo-protagonists, so you think the same it doesn't. This is Oliver's story more than Will's.

Will is not out to anyone, is major factor in how their relationship plays out. I think this was done well, consideration from both points of view, with both feelings been taken into account. Obviously, no one should be forced out but Will does go overboard in an attempt to hid their relationship.

This does deal with causal homophobia, by a causal, I mean making gay jokes while not intending target a gay or Queer person. Just to mock your friend because Straight boys think being gay is funny for some reason. I blame the patriarchy. This was a major problem when I was youngling and going off the teen barter I overhear its still a problem. Hopefully, this will not be a problem anymore in the future. I think its dealt with well and realistically.

This book deals with grief and the threat of grief. Knowing that you are likely to lose someone you love soon. This was done okay. The thing is I very recently read a 5/5 star book that had someone lose their Aunt to cancer. This book felt more about the romance than anything, so I didn't like it as much. I read romance heavy contemporaries but I'm Ace so I'm not all about that. There is a lot of romantic pairing going on, it's all very cute.

Overall, I give this book 4/5 stars for Rosegold Roses. This is cute romance with attempt at depth. It's perfect for people who like cute but want something more going on than just romance. T|he relationships between all the characters were done nicely.  I will read Gonzales again, her next book sounds interesting.

Read: 3/3/20199
Reviewed: 3/03/2020
Published Date: 5th March 2020
Publisher: Hodder Children's Books
Source: Netgalley
Content Warning: Cancer, Terminal Illness, Death of Love One, Homophobia, Being Outed (this not a big deal, but does happen technically twice), Diet and comments about eating,

Disclaimer: I received e-arc of this off the Publisher for review. My reviews are always honest.