Saturday 28 December 2019

Dead Year

Yes, I'm gonna do an actual wrap of goals, but now let's have a nonsense post of post chrismas thoughts.

Wednesday 25 December 2019

Book Review: Let It Snow by Maureen Johnson, John Green, Lauren Myracle

This book was sponsored by Starbucks. Also Wafflehouse.

The worst blizzard for fifty years.
Three wintry love stories.
One magical night.

It's Christmas Eve and Gracetown has been buried by snow. But the weather is more than just an inconvenience. When one girl unexpectedly steps off a stranded train, she sets off a series of life-changing events.

Soon fourteen pumped-up cheerleaders will descend on the local Waffle House, the Duke's DVD night will be rudely interrupted for a Twister mission, and a lovesick barista will determine the fate of a single teacup pig …

As the three stories collide, strangers cross paths and romance blossoms with heart-warming consequences.

This is a series of interlocking story, taking from Christmas Eve to Boxing Day. This is in America, so there do not use the term Boxing Day. This book was written in a time before everyone has smartphones but they all had iPods. My iPod Touch still lives, in my car with the on/off buttons stuck down and he battery is non-existed. This book is dated in more significant ways.

The Jubilee Express by Maureen Johnson: 4/5 stars for Train Escapes. There's a bit of girl hate in this one, Jubilee hates on Cheerleaders for no reason. It's actually the motivating factor to do something two times in the story. The romance was decent, it was also dealt with being in a bad relationship. A big thing is made of the character's name, which is Jubilee. There are worst X-men to share a name with. I usually love Maureen Johnson's writing but this was a bit of disappointment.

A Cheertastic Christmas Miracle by John Green: The girl hate continues in Duke whose not like other girls, because she's one of the guys. This is so 00s that I can't be that mad at it. This story is dated in itself and less on technology. James Bonds films will probably always be a thing. Once, again the cheerleaders are motivation in here. In a bad nash race to get to the Waffle House, because they've called three groups and gonna lock the door in weather that is definitely bad enough for someone to freeze to death after the first one makes it. Risking their lives for girls not at all interested and asinine friend. I just read a whole John Green novel and his characters are very similar but worst in this. 2.5 stars for Carla's Death.

The Patron Saint of Pigs by Lauren Myracle: This involves a teacup pig. Funfact: Teacup pigs do not exist. They are a lie and grow to be big giant pigs that will eat you if you fall unconscious in their presence. The girl hate is less in this story, almost apologetic to the rest of it. You're only a ho if you cheat on your boyfriend in public Starbucks. There is meant to be some sort of lesson to be self-involved but comes out of nowhere. Sure, maybe she is (other reviewers pick this up), but it's more she needs to let go of the fantasy, and learn better communication skills. Also don't make out with creeps, cheating on your boyfriend, just because they are momentarily nice to you. 3/5 for a Normal-sized Pigs.

I listened to the audiobook that has individual voice actors for each other story. They were all good, the only thing is that I had to change the reading speed, which was odd in the middle of the book to do.

Overall, I gave this book 3/5 stars for Not Enough Snow. I kept waiting for the cheerleaders to connect up, for one of them to be POV character, but in the end, it was Starbucks girl whose best friend gets eaten by a pig. I think the girl-hate could have been forgiven if the Cheerleaders were actually humanised, instead of ways to move the plot on.

Saturday 14 December 2019

In which Things get Worst

They didn't manage to ruin Halloween, but they did manage to ruin another goth holiday.

On the 12th I voted, then went to a concent by myself. My sibling was meant to come but had was ill. Thinks she had food poisoning, but maybe the drink was too much for her at the Baby's Brother Birthday, which was a thing on its own. Starters took an hour, they forgot my dinner, steaks came out cooked wrong, wrong drinks that took forever.

The concert was good, I saw Scouting for Girls, the support the Dunwells was good too. It was semi-ruined by my phone informing me at exactly 10pm what the exit polls were and of course, they were wrong, the results were worst. I tried to ignore it until I got home three hours later.

I brought too much Taco Bell to soothe my wounds, my sibling hassled me about whether I was coming home or not. Not because she missed me, but because I had her beer in my car. I had thought about staying at my sister's if the weather was really mad. Like Rain and strong winds, is the worst.

Also so are drunk people and people who get in line before they know what they want and the line wasn't long. Drunk people are worst though. Actually, I don't know since the others steal your time. But so do drunks.

Obvious, the tories and the people who vote for them are truly the worst of all. I just don't get how people can vote for proven liars over and over. Even if people are for Brexit, this a government who missed deadlines twice. These cabinet filled with people who have previously been fired by their own party.

A lot of it does feel like racism and ethnocentrism, or people not realising they are poor. Like a lot of people, this is a terrible outcome for me and my disabled family. But I am Scottish, meaning only some of my country fucked me over for their own self-interest.

I guess they would argue that I voted for my own self-interest. But I don't want to live in a country where people die because they can't afford health care. I don't want to live with starving children, especially when they have working parents. People should be able to survive by working a fulltime job. People should be able to survive on benefits.

I mean maybe we have another election next year, Tories are selfish, maybe even having the most power they've had since the 80s, they still fuck themselves over.

So many people are gonna suffer for this.

Anyway, I live in Scotland and the Scottish Government will take over PIP...still those that year meant be a long one. This is a bad timeline, and I want to stop relating so hard to distopias. We got bored of them and we're still living them.

Saturday 30 November 2019

Dead NaNoWriMo

So I have failed NaNoWriMo, I have written for this blog and nothing else. I had a genius idea and went to write it but then wrote nothing. I've had book reviews every week this month though. I uploaded one video. I want more content going up and being creative but it just not happening.

Frustrating. I'm planning to keep of a note of all my writing next month,  reviews which currently I have no arcs for it so it going to be a real free for all on here.

Wednesday 27 November 2019

Book Review: The Pact by Amy Heydenrych

This book has discussions of potentially triggering things, This book is not descriptive (a few scenes of violence, not in great detail compared to other books), I will be discussing those things in this review. Highlight to reveal content warnings.
Content Warnings: sexual Assault mentioned; Sexual Harassment; Sexual Manipulation; Bullying, Adult bullying; Mild Violence; Murder; Death; Bloody Death, Bad B

What if a prank leads to nothing?

What if a prank leads to murder?

When Freya arrives at her dream job with the city's hottest start-up, she can't wait to begin a new and exciting life, including dating her new colleague Jay.

However, Nicole, Jay's ex and fellow employee, seems intent on making her life a misery. After a big deadline, where Nicole continually picks on her, Freya snaps and tells Jay about the bullying and together they concoct a revenge prank. The next morning, Nicole is found dead in her apartment . . .

Is this just a prank gone wrong? Or does Freya know someone who is capable of murder - and could she be next?

This book was not what I expected. I was really excited by the idea of a Pact, but it was not much of a pact. There's no real pact, I got so excited, but a pact takes at least two consenting adults. The title comes from different pacts, but it was let down. I got so excited for the title, it just wasn't what I was hoping for.  Now, that I've lowed your expectations now for a fair review. It's not the book's fault that I had hoped for something else.

There is a lot of characters introduced, some that have very little effect of the plot, so the emphasis seems obvious misdirect. We have two POV characters, Isla a crime Journalist and Freya a newly graduated Computer Programmer who has just got her dream job but things go wrong quickly when her boss decides to bully her over some guy. The POV jumps time a lot, everything is framed in terms of the murder which works pretty well.

Fun fact: Apparently, this book is set in the past. You see Freya is a Millennial at 22 but her thirty-something boss is not. Now there's some debate but that debate makes Freya Gen Z. Born between 1981 – 1996 is the given, some go straight to 1999, but someone whose Thirty is definitely Millennial. I don't how old Heydenrych but it makes me think she not Millennial because Millennials are very aware they are in their thirties now. We're so old. It was an odd line anyway. I get why it's there but doesn't fully work.

This book has a lot going on. The bullying in the work place, by someone who is senior to Freya if not her direct boss. Your boss bullying you in your dream job does seem like a nightmare. Bullying books usually lack stakes which obviously this one has stakes. It also deals with living with the trauma of sexual assault and the threat of sexual assault that women face in their daily lives.
Heyenrych talks about wanting to show the power and intensity of women friendships, but there's so much about being unminded by men that doesn't really feel like the focus. I feel like having both Isla and Freya have 50% doesn't work, I feel it has to one or the other. There's a lot of Heydenrych wants to say. Freya's friendships do not feel the focus. I wish they were, that was the sort of book I hoped this book to be.

The solution of this works fine, but one of the major leads up to giving the characters a solution feels very tacked on and unnecessary. I do have thoughts, but it feels too much of a spoiler to discuss it in a review. Maybe I add spoiler section on Goodreads.

Overall, I give this 3/5 stars for Lace Cuffles. I was slow getting into this book, I read several graphic novels and audiobooks during the time it took me to read it, then read the majority of it one day after reading 10 pages or so a day then with big breaks, so I know that can affect how a book reads. I would read Heydenrych again, which I think is the biggest sign of whether a book was worth reading.
Isla also has Attention Deficit Disorder, it is mention only once and see nothing in the text to support it but I don't have ADD so I might have missed things.

I got this book for review off NetGalley and it is being published by Zaffre on 28/11/2019.

Saturday 23 November 2019

Dying NaNoWriMo

There is a week left of NaNoWriMo and I have certainly stopped writing every day. Or most days. Okay, I'm just writing these posts and reviews. Also the normal twitter nonsense which are some times essays that no one will read. I did film videos and edit on of them to announce the GhostAthon
That's right another Christmas based readathon, that says it holiday based but is clearly taking it challenges from Christmas Pop culture, but we actually have the gull to base the readathon during Christmas. It takes place from the 20 to the 31st December. Mainly because I wanted to do longer than a week with the challenges we have, otherwise it would have been the 26th to 31st December.

I have done some Bulletjournaling stuff but mostly I'm having a flare-up. My shoulders are cramping and numb and the fun new addition of acid reflux. I need to go to the doctor to see if everything is okay with my digestive system but I keep forgetting to, which week 5, so maybe I'm dying. I always think I'm dying. Probably because I am.

Anyway, time is limited so good day.

Tuesday 19 November 2019

Book Review: Kim Reaper Vol. 1: Grim Beginnings by Sarah Graley

Who wouldn't date a Cute Grim Reader?

Part-Time Grim Reaper. Full-Time Cutie!

Like most university students, Kim works a part-time job to make ends meet. Unlike most university students, Kim's job is pretty cool: she's a grim reaper, tasked with guiding souls into the afterlife.

Like most university students, Becka has a super intense crush. Unlike most university students, Becka's crush is on a beautiful gothic angel that frequents the underworld. Of course, she doesn't know that.

Unaware of the ghoulish drama she's about to step into, Becka finally gathers up the courage to ask Kim on a date! But when she falls into a ghostly portal and interrupts Kim at her job, she sets off a chain of events that will pit the two of them against angry cat-dads, vengeful zombies, and perhaps even the underworld itself. But if they work together, they just might make it... and maybe even get a smooch in the bargain.

This is a series that I saw at MCM, but I had spent already too much money. I love Grim Reaper based stories, so I took a photo of the graphic novels to look them up once I had money to spend on comics, but I found the first in Kindle Unlimited that I had a free trial of, so of course I picked this book.

The relationship is developed pretty quickly. They go from Kim not knowing Becka exists, to risking themselves for each other in one comic. Maybe it would work better if it was established that how lonely Kim was. It's hinted I guess. There's oddly not a lot of character time.

The plot is a bit rushed. This graphic novel is made up of four comics. Maybe I'm just too use to comics quite happy spending 10 issues on one story arc.  I think the problem they doesn't feel like much development for plot or the characters.

I do like the art style of these books. It's very cute. There's a lot of visual gags. I generally like the humour. 

An odd criticism that a lot of people have with this book is the diversity. I mean they say the book focus on diversity more than anything else which I don't think is true. This is a graphic novel, diversity is choosing to draw different people in crowd shorts. Yes, it has two Queer main characters, one being a person of colour, with no labels given to explain anyone's background. Not a lot of storytime is actually given to the diversity, it just there. Having diversity is a good point and this is a graphic novel, but I don't get spending so much time talking about the diversity without actually criticising it. Having good diversity doesn't make a good book, and this diversity is okay. It's probably not worth structuring a whole review about.

Overall, I give this book 3/5 stars for Skull Hearts. this is a fun comic series, with a focus on humour but is lacking in tension. I'm curious as to where this is going and hopefully improved. However, I'll probably be a while before I get around to getting a copy of Volume 2, mainly because I've already spent too money this year on books  and Christmas is coming.

Saturday 16 November 2019

Wordless NaNoWriMo

It's Saturday again and I have not mystery wrote a thousand and thousands of words for NaNoWriMo. I've not even hit the 10s, and I should definitely write 25,000 words if I'm to hit 50,000 this month. Writing 25,000 one day is not likely to happen.

I've been writing most days, I did fail on the 14th, which is life. Of course, so I need to fight this from being a trend. I lied to the NaNoWriMo website by saying I wrote one word when I didn't so I could keep my trend. It's fair because the NaNoWriMo has me down as writing no words on a day where I indeed did write words.

I'm still having ideas, but none that motivated me to write lots of words at a time. I know I have good story ideas, that I would read but I just need to unlock them, with the written word.

I wish there was a shut-in near me because I think that would really help my writing. I have done some Livestream sprints which did help, but I need someone do it at a decent time for me. Writing till 3am intently is not a good thing to do. I'm off to try and make myself write creatively. 

Wednesday 13 November 2019

Book Review: Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier

Last night I dreamt this was enjoyable.

Last night I dreamt I went to Manderley again...

With these words a reader is swept up into a world of secrets and lies; one of the most passionate, psychologically twisting and complex stories of all-time. 

Working as a lady's companion, the orphaned heroine of Rebecca learns her place. Life begins to look very bleak until, on a trip to the South of France, she meets Maxim de Winter, a handsome widower whose sudden proposal of marriage takes her by surprise. Whisked from glamorous Monte Carlo to his brooding estate, Manderley, on the Cornish Coast, the new Mrs de Winter finds Max a changed man. And the memory of his dead wife Rebecca is forever kept alive by the forbidding Mrs Danvers . . .

Rebecca is a story that I was roughly familiar with, having seen a few adaptions of it that just happened to be on TV and obvious with Rebecca having never been out of print, after 80 years it has been its way into pop culture.

So I knew that Rebecca was the first wife of nameless protagonist's husband and the big twist. There were a few things I didn't know, such as the 20 year age gap between the protagonist and her husband Maxim de Winter. Also the Ableism. No one really talks about that and that the plot semi-relays on an "Idiot's" reclation of events.

It's not just dated language, the protagonist seems scared of him just because he's mentally disabled. Words like "sly" are used to describe him and his "Idiot eyes". I'm not sure what is meant by this. Is he meant to have Down Syndrome? People do seem to base his capabilities on his looks. Mr De Winter does say he's more capable than he behaviours and his part of in the solution of the book is questionable. I think I could let it go more as just a dated language if the protagonist attitude towards him wasn't so detestable.

Besides the Ableism, which is never fun to read a book with, I think my biggest problem is that our protagonist is so bland. She completely defined by her social anxiety and is easily modelable. She is so obsessed with what other people think of her while not being worth much thought by herself. Even as someone with social anxiety I found it really hard to relate to her. The words shy are used obviously, but to me, it does seem on a level above shyness since she obsesses with it even when she not with people.

I know the two Mrs De Winters are meant to contrast and be each others' wrapped reflections, but I just don't like the protagonist at all. And I know that woman characters get away with less than their male counterparts but I would hate a male character like this too. I know she a product of her time as well, as girls were raised to follow and be severdo then. It just feels like she has no spine at all, questions no one with her fantasies of Rebecca. Her obsession with Rebecca becomes really dull, her unwillingness to question anything right till the very end. I suppose I should have more sympathy for a character who messes her life up so completely.

I listen to part of this on Audiobook, I read the first 30 pages physically and rest on Audiobook. Maybe that's part of the reason why I disliked it, that the writing style can be lost with a bad voice narration or even just an okay one. The narration was okay, listen to it on 1.50x speed to match my reading pace. I usually listen to audiobooks at 2x and did have to slow down because sometimes I couldn't understand the voice actor.

Overall, I gave this 2/5 stars for Sly Eyes. This rating probably comes down to enjoyment. Yes, this a well written, crafted novel, that happens to age poorly. I think it is hard to review books this old from just your gut, even with the more recent decades that I didn't live through I can flame them more easily with their counterparts as with this. Maybe I would enjoy this book more if I took the time to deep analysis and do research on how it stood next to other works. However, I have no reason to that. Yes, at it's core it's a compelling story, which probably why there are so many different adaptions.

Saturday 9 November 2019

Writing Without Details.

It is now Day Nine of National Novel Writing Month, or NaNoWriMo as we all scream into the night. I have written every day but one, the 4th day was, in fact, a failure. Though, if you go my NaNoWriMo stats, it will try and say I didn't write on the 6th, this a filly lie as I did write on the 6th and I did tell them so. Their website does need work, it gives you the option to say when you wrote but it still counts it was words for whatever day you input that information.

I was more a Camp NaNoWriMo writer so I have no strong opinions on the new website, it seems similar to the Camp one without cabin buddies. I know everyone else seems to hate the new website, more and more. I'm been focusing more on writing. Lol.

I have sort of finished one of my stories, in that it has an ending and a middle and most it links up together but there's other stuff I should add to really concert the story. The thing about writing to a word count, especially with the few sprints, I have found myself writing nonsense to get the word count. I have been writing more descriptions to do the same. I'm not a big description, my first instinct is not to lay out what my characters look like unless it is relevant. Probably because I'm autistic and that also not how I look for my rep. I know I do have the luxury of looking like most people on TV and books even if our cultures are completely different. I do look out for cultures and disabled rep.

Location details don't really make sense unless the character is in a new place or there's something important. A house is a house. Maybe I'm actually a crap writer. Probably. Who isn't?

I've written 6991 words so far, not including today, I should have wrote13,336 words if I want to hit 50,000 words that your novel is meant to be for NaNoWriMo. I'm just writing every day, and who knows maybe I'll write 10,000 one day and all the words will burst from me. Or I write nonsense everyday that will slowly die, a creative death.

I brought notebooks from paperchase online and they sent me a journal with a cut in it. I dm them and they sent me a new one which came today, well, guess what they sent me one with a cut in it so who knows what is going on with them, but I won't be ordering online again from them. 10 percent discord doesn't cover damage products. I just accept half-priced for damaged goods, I just wanted to swapped it for a non-damaged ones. It will get banged up with use, but I don't think I was ever going to stab it. It's quite nice otherwise. I'll just put a sticker on it.

I suppose I should get back to the creative process and totally not play the Sims while I hype myself for an expansion I'll probably get bored of in a week.

Wednesday 6 November 2019

Book Review: Crooked Kingdom by Leigh Bardugo

I just wanted a well rounded dyslexic character kicking butt, bonus if not a boy.

Kaz Brekker and his crew of deadly outcasts have just pulled off a heist so daring even they didn't think they'd survive. But instead of divvying up a fat reward, they're right back to fighting for their lives.

Double-crossed and badly weakened, the crew is low on resources, allies, and hope. As powerful forces from around the world descend on Ketterdam to root out the secrets of the dangerous drug known as jurda parem, old rivals and new enemies emerge to challenge Kaz's cunning and test the team's fragile loyalties.

A war will be waged on the city's dark and twisting streets - a battle for revenge and redemption that will decide the fate of the Grisha world.

I have no pressing reason to review this book as it's not by a British writer or book I received for free off a publisher/author. But like I said in my review of the first book, this series has rep that affects me and is hard to find. This review will have spoilers for the first book but I try best to avoid spoilers in my reviews of the actual book I'm reviewing.

So one of the characters is coded Dyslexic. Weasley is unable to read and his dad is a dick about it because he's evil. The rep is okay I guess. I mean, it's mostly Weasley wishing he could read so things would go faster and a little talk about the failure of him being taught. It's kinda raised that he could have been taught wrong. Dyslexic people do process information differently, meaning they have to be taught differently. It never goes into details and he has no other symptoms of Dyslexia except being capable of non-reading things.

I listen to the audiobook of this whole series, and Weasley voice actor sure did make a choice when it came to doing Kaz. He's an old man with him and Weasley has a bigger part than the last book so it never came up till now. I don't mind multiple voices in audiobooks but I do when the voice actors do completely different things for a character. It's very distracting. I guess it's meant to show how Weasley sees Kaz compared to the other characters.

There are high emotion moments, that I feel are meant to be devastating but I just felt whatever about. I don't understand the choice. I guess I just wasn't that invested. There is a lot of characters at play and I did feel for the most of them. That part just didn't have an impact for me.

Overall, I give this book and the series 4/5 stars for Sugar Eating. This was fun, dark read so my type of reading. The world-building was great and it's definitely great to have multiple Disabled characters in one series. Having read this series now, I'm really interested in reading Ninth House on how it had to be an adult novel. I guess maybe you get away with least in Urban Fantasy over straight-up fantasy.

Saturday 2 November 2019

NaNoWriMo Tales

Halloween is over and I have yet again not managed to get any stories out of my head. So this NaNoWriMo I'm just going to write Halloween inspired horror stories that are mostly from ideas that I at least started or wrote down with every intention of starting them.

Mostly this has involved half wrote down dreams, that I know were more elaborate at one point. NaNoWriMo has never worked for me. I don't know if doing short stories will work, especially as a lot of my short stories have turned into novels that never had their endings written out. I am a pantser by nature as outlining seems to kill stories for me. I like the process of figuring out what I'm doing. Though, not knowing that in the moment has killed stories before as well.

The whole Halloween puppy is going fine. He was briefly dressed up and didn't seem to mind which a good sign for when he needs to wear a harness or jacket. He still so cute and soft meaning I let him away with most of his misbehaviour. I still am getting starched arms and he's obsessed with paper of all kinds. Many a toilet roll ruined. He can sit and give a paw, not at all consistently but he sort of knows those words. My sibling refused to look after him today because of his obsession with her cat, but I have looked after her dog I don't know how many times. I find iconic as she trained Mysti to chase the cats into corners so she could catch them.

My actual Halloween with Halloween Puppies was mostly watching bad remakes of horror films and the classic that is Hocus Pocus. Child's Play is now about robots being dolls sized and programmed for violence. Also, the doll just looks creepy immediately and makes odd references to the original film e.g. a character saying "This is the End" and not even finished the quote "This is the end, my friend." I had planned to see it in the cinema but never managed to. I don't think I missed much.
We also watched Pet Sematary (2019), which was very slow and boring, with the knowledge of how it was roughly going to go. Knowing the plot of the film doesn't ruin it for me, but I wonder when a film is bad if the twist is all that could have saved it.

I also finally brought Sims 4 on Halloween night, I've owned the base game for months since EA gave it out for nothing, but not played it since I knew it was lacking from what I've seen online. Probably why EA gave it out for nothing, hoping to capture those simmers who still watch online content but decide never to invest the money. Sims 3 was the better game, Houseboats were the best. Just being able to pack your house in the middle of the ocean and it had unicorns in them.

With all this writing and Sims 4 playing, I've also decided to go back to knitting. I'm hoping to finally do more than a blanket or scarf. I did once attempt a bag but that was just a banket in disguise. I also still Bullet journalling. And book reviewing. And video making. And have a dog to train.

Maybe I'll somehow learn to do everything while life goes on. I can probably knit and play the sims at the same time.

Wednesday 30 October 2019

Book Review: Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo

I want a cool cane but there are so expensive.

Criminal prodigy Kaz Brekker is offered a chance at a deadly heist that could make him rich beyond his wildest dreams - but he can't pull it off alone.
A convict with a thirst for revenge. A sharpshooter who can't walk away from a wager. A runaway with a privileged past. A spy known as the Wraith. A Heartrender using her magic to survive the slums. A thief with a gift for unlikely escapes. Six dangerous outcasts. One impossible heist.
Kaz's crew is the only thing that might stand between the world and destruction - if they don't kill each other first.

I had forgotten that I once upon a time that I requested a review copy of this book and I always believe in reviewing books that I do end up reading from my review pile. I only realise when I went to mark on my Spreadsheet of books that I had finished this book, that I found it on my NetGalley arc lists. This is all funny because as I was listening to it, I was like "Ha Ha I don't have to review this and can just go on to the sequel book." I suppose, now in 2019, people wouldn't have minded if I just fulfil the need to review this book by reviewing the whole duology as one. But here we are single again.

Yes, I have read the whole the Grisha trilogy and while liking the world, I did have issues with the solution to that series. Honestly, it's depressing as hell. This book does have sad things; that can be found in life right now. This is a heist plot at its core with a bunch of personal storylines that all the characters have.

This is a lot pairing off in our Six of Crows gang. It's basically made up of couples to be. They all fine, a decent Hate/Prejudice to Love thing and another too emotionally scarred to just being together. The relationships are fine, we do have Queer characters and there's a bit of pinning over the seemly straight ones. The characters are okay, they all have different wants and motivations. I feel for them,

The rep in this book is okay, there's a lot this book is meant to have but I never pay attention to character descriptions except for the weird Irish Stereotypes that I just sigh at now but won't say anything because it's not a weird Scottish stereotype and this is a technically a fantasy world originally based off Russia. I know how the characters look more because of the fan outrage over the casting than anything else. I know Nina is meant to be plus-sized a.k.a. fat like me. Nina is very obsessed with food so I don't love that about her but she is also very "sexy" which is nice to see with a fat character and her love of food isn't made out to be a bad thing.

Now for the rep that I actually care about it, because it affects me and is lacking in fiction. There are two Disabled characters in this book. Kaz is out there with his badly healed broken leg and then another character whose disability is a twist. I actually recently tweeted that there is so few dyslexic characters or even coded ones in fantasy and books in general. This is the most undeveloped character of the crew and I'm hoping that in the sequel they are more developed and more like actual rep.

Overall, I give this book 4/5 stars for fragile Ice. This is a fun book about revenge and other things. Yeah, tons of sad things that play into the real world but in a fun way. We already discussed in other reviews that weird definition of fun books. Ableism would be easier to cope with if it came with magic and heists.

Update: I have now read and reviewed the sequel.

An e-arc was provided from Netgalley and this book was published by Orion Children's Books on 2 June 2016 (I'm not sure if this was the UK date or not since I brought it in 2015, but maybe I did pre-order it).

Saturday 5 October 2019

Horror is...never ending,

We are now into October. My favourite month of the year. I was expecting to be complete broke this month but not the case. I still need to be better with my money than I am usually. I wish I was better with my money in general.

I've been having more story ideas. Hell, I even started writing one. That's not a finish. A finish has been eluding me for several years. Like dreams where you woke up before the big finish, which is almost always as dreams happen in the state of half wakefulness. I know I should probably just make myself write one till the end. But that's hard. It hard enough for me to make write ends to these blog posts which is why they always go up late.

Though I mostly write horror so I could just write that main character dies every time, for every short story but I think if someone invested in a novel they would be pissed if that's the way it went. Especially, if it was more than two novels.

On the plus, fun side I am getting a puppy. That was one of the money issues that would make me broke, but I was planning to get Leia a playmate. I will have this time next week. Thursday even. My parents want to share him, which means halfies. I bet it just be for the dog. Not the cost of buying it a cage, new toys and a bed. Well, they could share a bed. especially as Leia tends to jam herself where ever I'm sleeping and already has two dog beds.

So that's my life right now. Horror, Dogs and being bad with money.

Saturday 28 September 2019

Scotland's Town of Towns.

So I went to Wigtown for the first time today. I have been aware of Scotland's "Natural Book Time" and mocked it for its random title. Yeah, it was decided by a committee. I am kinda curious about the towns that failed to get the title.

I went to see Hannah Witton who I like enough as a YouTuber, so I thought why not go see what this place is actually like and check out them. The events were poorly planed but they are literally planned by teenagers. Maybe they should be more guidance. Talk about periods was 16+ so that some nonsense sexism, nine-year-olds deal with periods and should know about these things. For a book festival, the young adult side of the festival was mostly YouTubers who just happened to have books, more than authors that wrote for that age group.

There was no signing after the first event which was odd and would have been frustrating if I wasn't going to a straight event. I like to have signed books by writers that I have met in real life, no matter how awkward I am. I ended bumping into Hannah a few times and I said nothing to her because I am Selective Mute awkward mess.

Funfact, the events were sponsored by the same charity that paid for my driving lessons and shoes once. Fun.

The Book Town is obvious a grab for tourist, for a place a bit too far out the way for there to be any reason to go to. The architecture is the same as other towns nearby that are on the way to things that are interesting. The bookshops are cool I guess, but also I was too tired to temp to go to more than two. I went to the new kid one and the one claiming to be the biggest bookshop in Scotland. I was tempted to test that because I can't imagine that's true and you do find a lot of false of claims in Dumfries and Galloway. The sign says The BookShop, "the Largest in Scotland", the internet says used Bookshop in Scotland. Sure, probably most used bookshops couldn't get away with having a whole house dedicated to them. How does it survive? I bet it gets grants and cheap rent.

Selling point, the festival actually is set up with a bowling lawn in the centre. No one really was playing on it, but you could sit around on benches and I think about how the hell does one playing this type of bowling.

In conclusion, sure it would be cool if you lived there but even for me as someone in the same county, it's too far for just wander. I think I would only go again if someone I really loved was going there and hell if I ever got published I would offer to go just for petrol costs (I imagine the petrol will only rise in cost). I'm curious about how the festival is actually run, in terms of choosing who they pay to come. Is the U26 really just teenagers unchecked? If so that would make a good YA plot.

Saturday 21 September 2019

Sun's Revenge

The Sun has returned for her Revenge in September. That it is fully meant to be Autumn now but we have having Summer weather. It is usually warm at the start of September, just to spite school children and teachers, but it carried on a bit more.

Obviously, the Sun does stick around for winter and the colder months so she can blind you as you drive on icy roads. It's the team-up fight you don't want to have as you're driving.

I am too tired to remember my point.

Saturday 14 September 2019

Motaway Veteran

Days Disappear from me all the time. It only yesterday where I was thinking of writing last Saturday's post. But it obviously wasn't as.

I went to New Castle for no reasons outside my control, so I made the adventure of going to Taco Bell. It was not advisable to experience. I had to get to the town centre by going on the motorway. Maybe there was another way, but I obviously don't know New Castle enough to fight about google about. Sure, Google has taken me some asinine routes.

I found a Waterstones so it wasn't all bad. I brought a book which I should not have done as I really need to pay for Parking is, of course, a nightmare unless willing to pay in a multistory. I wanted to go to the cinema but not sure of the parking to actually do it. Yes, driving over 6 hours in total in one day is a lot but my parents act like I had never been to a city before. I've drove to the capital by myself during my first year of driving.

I was actually disappointed by its lack of motorway as a whole to get there. My parents made out it was all motorway, when it was just motorway to get out and partly on the way back. I also went through Carlise on the way back. I even went into a McDonalds, where I live everyone raves about Carlise. No idea why, when you could go to Glasgow at the same time. Especially on this side. I know people who rave Carlise but Ayr is right there people. This is very specific nonsense. Anyway, why?

I'm gonna go to bed. I have to go back one last time for reasons. Not my reasons but reasons. The opposite of why I went there in the first place. The Taco Bell was fine but I will not be back, because I cannot be bothered to go back.

Wednesday 4 September 2019

Book Review: All the Better Part of Me by Molly Ringle

Bi, Gothic and 26, who is spying on me?

It’s an inconvenient time for Sinter Blackwell to realize he’s bisexual. He’s a twenty-five-year-old American actor working in London, living far away from his disapproving parents in the Pacific Northwest, and enjoying a flirtation with his director Fiona. But he can’t deny that his favorite parts of each day are the messages from his gay best friend Andy in Seattle—whom Sinter once kissed when they were fifteen. Finally he decides to return to America to visit Andy and discover what’s between them, if anything. He isn’t seeking love, and definitely doesn’t want drama. But both love and drama seem determined to find him. Family complications soon force him into the most consequential decisions of his life, threatening all his most important relationships: with Andy, Fiona, his parents, and everyone else who’s counting on him. Choosing the right role to play has never been harder.

I really liked this book. I enjoyed the Bi nonsense. It has a lot of Tropes and enjoyed those tropes. Is the plot of this book realistic? Not fully. But sometimes it nice to read fluffy angst where you know everything will work out in the end.

This book does have darker stuff like questioning your sexuality and gaining the courage to come out. There's also the idea of staying closet if you're Bi because it might never come up. It kinda goes over how self-denial is bad and how Sinter is messed up by having done this for the past. So as a Bi-romantic person, I was fine with the rep. He's questioning and messed up with how he was raised so that rep for someone else. Not my personal experience, living my Tumblr live s

Now time for one of my famously weird tangents: There is a British character called Sebastian in this book, which is fiction code for posh arsehole. Sorry, any Sebastian out there. This character is Trans (rep is not a spoiler, yes sometimes a nice surprise but also I'm allowed to talk about it in reviews). In non-expert or in my non-lived experience, the trans rep is fine. Sebastian is his own character. My problem is that being trans means that he picked that terrible name for himself. No arsehole or old fashion parents here to blame. Also, Sebastian speaks very working-class and is roughly the same age as me so I must conclude that he named himself after the crab. My point is that Sebastian is a weirder name than Sinter. It's a Rom-Com myth that they exist. Sebastian is the lead singer of a band, so enjoy that YA Readers.

The rest of the Englishness stuff is fine. It's very rom-com but go ask an English person. Not a lot of British TV movies get made, it definitely sounds more like an indie film than a TV movie. Miniseries are more our thing. It doesn't really matter because its in the effect of a fun plot. Who needs reality?

Overall, I gave this book 5/5 stars for Queers Messing Up. I really enjoyed this book, it's fun Angst which a constant fanfiction reader so I'm here for it. This is the Bi Rom-Com that I've never gonna see when I'm the same age as the character because I'm 26 now and close to the Grave. There are also lots of Queer named characters so I'm happy. I think enjoyment will come down to the tropes you're okay with or like. I know some people will hate the tropes (see Content warnings)  in this but I'm fine with the execution. This is not the best book ever, but it made me aw a lot.

There's a playlist for this book made up of 80s songs in the acknowledgements/chapter titles, and as we all love the 80s I made that playlist on Spotify:

I received this e-arc for review and it was published by Central Avenue Publishing on 3rd September 2019 (Yesterday).

CW: Accidental Pregnancy; Adoption; Abortion mentioned; Homophobia; Parents messing you up; Disownment; Being Outed;

Saturday 31 August 2019

Writing in Bed

I am in my house which is an odd occasion due to the number of times I've had to housesit or serve weather has caused me to stay at my parents. Peace is nice to have and I get to do stuff like write in bed when my back hurts a lot like it does right now so that what I'm doing now.

Leia seems to be both delighted and confused. I think she likes the bigger window sill to sit in and she gets to go outside more because I'm still my parents' carer so I'm still going to my parents' house every day. I accidentally stayed last night because I walked over and then it got dark so I decided to just stay since why not.

Leia is also being creepy by growling down the stairs at night and cry over a ball she has not given me. So she thinks the house is haunted by movie logic. I can hear her now down the stairs, tapping on the kitchen floor. She also a major bed hog. I have a double bed and she still manages to hog the covers and take up the 80s of the bed by lying across it.

I've decided I'm serious about reviewing again so have requested a bunch of stuff off NetGalley, instead, you know of tackling my backlist which over a hundred books by now. But is that not me at my core. I spent too much money on books. I need to save money.

Tomorrow is September so Halloween begins now and I have things to prepare for. Still behind but I have 13 days to catch up. So not much to report, so I think I go to bed.

Saturday 24 August 2019

StrangeAthon Time.

The StrangeAthon is fully planned. Not fully designed. I love drawing/designing but I am also really bad at it since stopped. Also, I've ended up Graphically designing a lot of things, something I was so not about when I actually studied Graphic Design. I have thought about seeing if I could finish that qualification but I'm not sure. 

I'm still trying but I feel like I've done so little this month. Hardly any reading, hardly any film watching or TV. I've let my Bullet Journalling of out the window.

Reviews ha. Life is life I guess. I'll keep trying. I have did a lot of planning for the StrangeAthon but it doesn't feel like it was all my time.

Oh well.

Saturday 3 August 2019

A Sentence.

Well, I managed to forget my sibling's Birthday. It's tomorrow and I have not got a clue what to get her.

Saturday 27 July 2019

Slowed Down Writing

My writing has slowly gone out of the window. I got out of the habit of writing every day due to not being home all day. I have been feeling bouts of inspiration so maybe that's a sign that I need to keep going.

The StrangeAthon is currently going and that has only been a mini-fail as I got the challenges up in a reasonable time. Not so much the videos or the Sprints I said I was going to do.

Hell this post in only three paragraphs.

Saturday 13 July 2019

The "A Haunting" ep with the hospital.

Writing has taken a backseat to hospital visits and generally fucking around. I'm not the one in Hospital. Life is strange when someone in your immediate family is in the Hospital. I'm spending a lot of time alone with a small army of cats and a dog who is both clingy and doesn't understand that if she wants me to play fetch, she has to actually bring me the ball, not put it at the end of the couch and stared at it.

Stressfully and feeling guilty because you did the wrong thing, but also knowing you didn't know the full picture.

I got a wifi camera to spy on the animals when I have to leave them to their nonsense and there's no one to send me pictures. Pictures of Spiderman. I mean pictures of my dog, knowing what she doing at any moment. Even if that usually sleeping in a window; barking her head off for no reason or chasing a cat. She staring at me where a ball is out of arms reach of me. I love her but sometimes she drives me up a wall with her weird ball notions.

Basically, this has caused things I was planning for this week/month to be out a wack but things could be worse. Life is constant of throwing things out wack, while it laughs at your plans. Somethings might recover but making videos is unlikely thing right now. Though, I am in an empty house except for animals and apparently ghosts.

That's right the first time I have an infrared red security camera, I capture two orbs at 3am something. This amuses me more than anything else. I am the person who falls asleep to A Haunting. They do look legit but one also came from my cat's stomach.

I don't have much to say today, so I shall bow out until I have words. Now enjoy this video.

Saturday 6 July 2019

Camping at NaNoWriMo Again.

I am attempting Camp NaNoWriMo for the I don't know time. I first did it in 2012, but I haven't done it every year. Maybe this is the fourth. But Camp NaNoWriMo happens a few times a year, so probably have had a few half-arsed attempts over the years. I was trying to do a short story a day thing, which didn't work out again.

My 2015 attempt turned into a novel that has an ending of sorts that was never written out and now I find myself writing a very odd duo point of view superhero nonsense. It's a lot of office Politics but 

I haven't written a ton, probably due to it having no plot. It was meant to be a day in the life, but then I had to give my protagonist a fuck-up background and an Angsty love interest whose literal name is Angst right now. I haven't given most of the characters actual names, just stand-ins until I can figure out what I want their names to actually be. 

For example, a character is currently called E-Mega. It's a superhero thing, but it really doesn't suit him, primarily as he's meant to be this Golden Era character. If his origins were the 80s, then it could work, but him to be this stuffy immortal, that's out of touch with the world and kinda done. Going for that whole immortal thing. A lot of comic book characters are immortal when you actually look into, but no one in comics actually ages, so it rarely comes up. 

 I have a few characters I'm gonna have immortal or at least Legacies anyway. Dealing with the idea of these superhero organisations actually be around for the time for the superhero comic books. But mostly it's teenage adults fucking things up, hence why they could use the pet name Angst for each other. 

I'm enjoying writing this nonsense, but it's still ruined by the fact that it could only be a character study in its current form. Maybe if I keep writing, I'll eventually figure out an actual storyline that could carry something longer than a page. I guess I could go back to Nails Polish or the Stranger, novels where I know how they end, just have to figure out the well.

I've also started making videos again, participating in a month-long readathon. I also didn't get that job, shockingly. Well, now I can get a puppy guilt-free and shit talk the Big Bang Theory in all the ways it deserves. I've never read today, but I watched four films, including The Brady Bunch film which I have been watching clips of off YouTube for the past two weeks for some reason. Also Beyond Brief so it's been very retro today. I'm off to sleep or some other nonsense. 

Saturday 22 June 2019

A List Of Not

My goal of applying for things is not going well. I just cannot bring myself to do it. As I'm writing this, I should be finishing an applicant for a potentially cool job.

Things I did instead of filling out this application:
  • Went to the cinema and saw four films in a row (one was in 3D)
  • Watch videos about the Drama that is Vegan YouTube (take victims for the love of God)
  • Cuddle my dog like a baby
  • Joined a readathon and start trying to come with a TBR for it.
  • Have mini-panic attacks about wasting time instead of just answering these questions.
  • Argue with my dog about her crying at me.
  • Check my DNA update on (not sponsored). 
  • Annoying my dog by waking her up
  • Wrote several nonsensical tweets about this process.
  • My dog demanded love by attack kissing me.
  • Reminiscing about past Productions, I was involved with.
  • Shutting down American Headcanons of Harry Potter. 
  • Wrote this list.
I ended up summiting the application but have no faith that it will go well. But that's life. Who knows maybe they're be real impressed by rambling for six paragraphs for one question. I suck. If I hadn't procrastinated, but I also have been trying to read six library books in one day.

I get too anxious about these things. I haven't been pushing myself as much. I mean have been failing to write on this blog or review books either. I have done some smaller reviews but not to a standard at all. More just random thoughts about books that will never get proper reviews.

I haven't filmed anything, editing has been touched and then abandoned. I still want to do all these things. Part of it being a carer but mainly I think I've been letting the day get away from me. I lack structure. Maybe a schedule would help, but I'm not sure if a self-made one would work.

Not sponsored but I brought Grammarly Premimun. I wonder how it can possibly worth £20 a month. We're be seeing if it is.
I'm certainly going to cancel it after this month. I was just feeling slightly panicked, and I should go back into writing, so maybe it will be usefully.

Going to see Pink tomorrow which is bound to be a thing, since we did not manage to get Disabled tickets.

Saturday 20 April 2019

Dinosaur Ride Dream

So this meta blog post about dream in which I write a blog post. This is the content you're getting now. It's not even an interesting story movie dream I have sometimes. No, it's about this ride at this park, that has to be the biggest pack in existance. Bigger than all of Disney World including the empty land between days.

I even wrote fiction today.

Dream 19/04/2019:
While on Holiday, go to this dinosaur ride in Trope park like place. This ride is in the back of the park. It's the newest ride, it's a trackless fly like ride, that involves going through a cave. There is also a video explaining a story-line that does not exist in the park. Some minorly famous actor appears in the ride videos, but is definitely not Sean Bean, (or is he?). No one else is a at all recognisable. The dream starts like Exportation Park video, going into the detail of how it was built and other such nonsense but this is a bland new ride.

It then switches to my pov (but still me dreaming in third person), going on to the ride for the first time.

After going on the ride, I write a blog post about the experience/general thoughts of the park, which leads me to doing more research and then leads me to go back to the pack to follow this obvious black cable going pack and leading through the ride building. I go back into the ride building/seating area. The area is covered but the seats are still soaked somehow. A solid level of water on these metal squares that are used as seating.

I sit there for a while, in the back of my mind, my sibling is near by, waiting for me. The pack closes, so they lock the ride building with people inside, leading us out the back, past this computer section where the white family made of a mum and six kids book tickets for tomorrow. This part of the building is typically jungle browns themed. This is only part that's completely inside.

Going out the back is confusing and I end up following this woman and her kid who wasn't waiting in the waiting area before. The steps have blue arrows that don't make sense so end up trapped on this ramp/stairs bit that doesn't look like it should be seen by guess compared to the rest of the pack. I follow this lady into a back building that connected to the ride. The begins to be the feel that this lady is here not by accident and is looking for something.

I looked at my digital watch that tells me it's 6:31 clock meaning I think the park shut when it was six clock, it was still daylight outside, I guess consistent with evening light but also a dream so it could be any time especially when location is revealed.

I follow this lady further into this back building. We can hear the ride still going and we past parts of the ride that is still for some reason still automatically running with no people on it and the sound effects are still going, which I thought was weird as they have neighbours who would hear the ride still going. We climb over things that make obvious we going the wrong way in hindsight but I don't think dream me thought about it. We climb over this ride track that themed to the ride, being brown with purple splashing. It sharped wrong for track is bumpy and coated thickly which makes sense since this ride has no tracks but I guess has fake tracks for story reasons that I can't remember ever learning.

At some point, the little girl disappears and we're in this old factory building but the rooms are finished. Walls painted white. The place is full of craft stuff as though it mainly used for designing. So we're hopeless lost. We go into this room when we hear staff coming. The woman wants to hide from them. I don't question this, but tell her I have enough so got out into the hall to meet the staff. It's a group of teenagers in blue polo shirts which is the standard uniform of the park. They look confused to see me, but I tell them I got lost and ask if they could show me the way out.

They awkwardly point to this ramp that walked past before, that has this black bit of cardboard, hang from the roof. It's big enough to the block the entrance, but you can see the exit if look under it, so I feel like idiot when it's pointed out. Dream Logical I guess, because why would that ever be the exit. There was still random chalk blue arrows in place in the building.

I get out the building and it leads me outside in this built up place. Up this hill with flat buildings that recently been built. Those orange rock coated ones. It's now dark but I'm not sure of the time. I start walking down this hill which eventually leads me to a main street (for a big town) and has two McDonalds on it. A normal one and McDonalds McCafe that is closed for the day. The place is pretty empty and I recognise the place but I can't think where I am.

I bump into these two guys that are 80s style of punks that I don't trust that walking down this same hill, but then people I recognised from uni are there. Specifically, randomly Amy who I've not talked to much. She the only one I actually recognise from real life. We all walking towards this parking lot where my car and I guess my sibling are.

Amy and I are trying to get a signal on our phones to figure out where we are, while walking along this dark country road with this group I'm now in. Finally, I get google maps to work and we somehow in Cumbernauld. Before this park felt like it was in London or Germany. Even my dream brain couldn't wrap around how this park exited in Cumbernauld or figure out where this packing lot.

I then call my sibling whose waiting for me in this packing lot. She annoyed, obviously. I tell her to go wait in the 24 hours McDonlads or the Tescos which I dreamt of before and I suddenly know is near this pack. In the back of mind since leaving the factory building is that I should just get a taxi to the park parking but I wanted to know where I am. I guess I had decided to just walk it but this is where this dream breaks down because I wake up then to Leia and darkness where it's 3.30am.

Saturday 13 April 2019

Being Ill and wandering into the Twilight Zone.

I have been ill for the majority of April; it was probably the flu. It also hospitalised my sister for a week. They were probably being cautious, but doesn’t it sound more dramatically to say I was ill with the thing that Hospitalised my sibling and then leave out the bit where she got a transplant a few months ago and is autoimmune compromised.

It’s not liked my life needs the extra layer of drama. Or maybe it does. My life is minefield of boring surround by medical craziness and a family who definitely needs therapy. I've been ill so that while I've been missing in action.

So Twilight Zone is back and I’m been rewatching the classic episodes. The problem with the new episodes is that there too much like the classics. I mean I could just watch the classics. The first one is random ep, but the second one is the main one that has been remade already twice times. The Twilight Film, and let’s be honest The Simpsons counts as remake.  I mean the Simpsons have remade a lot of the Twilight episodes and generally, it’s a bad idea to pick the most known stories.

Going off the Trailer they are going after the episodes that both were in the film and in the Simpsons, which basically just straight up remade those eps but with the Simpsons. I mean, they doing the evil kid but he’s president because the President of the USA is a fucking child. Political statement. By the way, of course the Twilight Zone has always been politic. That was Rod Sterling’s main motivation for getting the series made.

But there’s difference between the communists being Aliens/they are the monster themselves and the Terrorists being Terrorists. I’ve only watched the 1 and half eps. That’s right I bailed on the 20,000 feet remake. There are several problems.

Obviously, this is the most famous ep of Twilight Zone. It’s been parodied and frankly was one first shorts at horror on a plane but 56 years later, bitch we’ve been there with snakes and polar bears. The worst part that while trying to be inventive with true crime podcast from the future, it’s has the premise of Final Destination, which then makes me think of the X-files and Scully’s brother.

The X-files thing aside, there’s has now been plenty of films/shows that have dealt with the horror of air travel. 1963 only had the terror of being trapped in the air, completely out of your control, this was before hijacking would become real fear in 70s and planes would explode over villages. Gremlins are now beloved 80s franchise. My main point is that fear of the air travel has been ran into the ground. Hell, there’s several pop culture moments where an airplane is limbo.

The real problem with 30,000 feet is that completely breaks down when questioned and frankly someone would notice that pilot’s voice changes after someone has stormed the cabin. Like I said I didn’t watch the ending but I did wikipeded to know if was worth my time. They all have to die/never to be found. Maybe the podcast series starts before they found somehow but the info in it wouldn’t be common knowledge yet. I guess the person who wrote this ep doesn’t actually listen to mystery/true crime podcasts.

I have yet to watch the third ep which I’ve heard is better and is more of its own thing. I do think Jordan Peele is the right fit to give this ago and it’s not that I don’t think old eps should not be revisited. They are eps that so belong to their time that updating for now would make a lot of sense, but Nightmare at 20,000 and a comedian getting his comeuppance are pretty timeless stories (by the way, none of those reference list have mentioned “It's Take My Life...Please!, season 1, episode 22, so we know them to be bull and only know like five episodes).

Now, Jess-Belle is my argument for ep that should be updated. One, it’s was originally set in time period that was nostalgical for its viewers. Two, suffers from time period where woman couldn’t just be straight up evil. Three, Billy Bob is fuck-boy and gets no comeuppance. He should be the bug at the end and Jess-Belle and bland love interest should run off together. I turn everything Queer in my head, mainly because it more interesting in two girls fighting over a fuck-boy. They should love each other instead. Friendships is acceptable too.

But seriously, there’s a lot of eps that play with revisiting the times of our parents. It would be interesting to revisit the 60s or time before phones. Revisiting the 80s is obvious one as well. The Twilight Zone often played with nostalgia; it was one of its main themes. We’re literally living in a Dystopia now, so playing with that nostalgia makes sense. A time before the threat of Nuclear devastation was the norm and just something you live with like terrorism and child predators.

In all fairness, the Twilight Zone was the first tv show to play with horror and sci-fi in such a smart way and has sharped so many stories. Hell, bloody the plot Toy Story 1 and 2 appears in the Twilight Zone.  Frankly, most horror tropes can be found in the Twilight Zone.  Obviously, a lot before Twilight Zone is gone. We don’t know exactly everything that shaped it, we know that short stories and radio plays helped. Urban Myths is something they touched on, especially with the stories set 60 years ago in them.

Parallel universe are in Twilight Zone and what would happen if you found yourself in a slightly different world. Mandela Effect before that had name.

The Twilight Zone is massive, and we have been wandering in for over decade of culture with other shows and works stepping into with and without its name. The 80s sure did have a lot of Horror anthologies. The only one I’ve watched completely is Freddy’s Nightmares, the rest are strew in my brain. I recently discovered ‘Tales from the Darkside’ which is so blatantly the Twilight Zone it’s beautiful with it’s gay 80s uncles giving their nieces evil doll houses.  I also have the nonsense that is ‘Urban Gothic’.

There’s never quite been a show that deals with Technology and horror in the way Twilight Zone did. Hell, Black Mirror has failed to keep being good after being Americanised. Maybe if it moved from the mirror instead of finding different ways to say technology bad. Frankly, it just got very obvious. I think Black Mirror is never going to say all there is to actually say to say about how the world works now; there is definitely room to make podcasts horrifying but predicating plane clashes is pretty overdue.

Horror doesn’t have to say anything but it’s a lot more interesting when it does. The Twilight Zone is a place that I want to wander into 2019, but I don’t want to go over the same story plot over and over. The themes and the core of its idea is what we should be doing, not remaking classic episodes.

Also 40 minutes is too long for most Twilight Eps, I even think the classic eps suffer at being too long at hour length for TV. It’s better to slap the audience and run, than slowly tap their faces and then walk away. A lot of this is just my random thoughts, if I was still making videos, this would be one.

Also the voice thing in US (2019) being very bad choice would have been a video. All you gonna miss is being making joke that Jordan Peele should hire me to work some mystery thing (maybe if they second session of Twilight Zone) but also not because they also a bunch of POC who are also mute and deserves their voices to be heard. But also, in all seriously, hire me too LOL. I’ve not worked out if Jordan Peele actually has that much control over Twilight Zone reboot but also I’m just putting out there I want to re-write Jess-Belle for modern audience and it’s not over played ep to do it with. I also just want to put ‘but’ too many times in a paragraph, with ‘also’ guess starring.

Twilight Zone is beloved thing for me, it has so many eps with dolls involved and that’s why I love it. Also, the politic messages and how it’s least not offensive. I haven’t made it through a proper re-watch but they actually hire Asian actors to play Asian parts, so far. Also random Asian waitress in one. "A Quality of Mercy" is bit awkward with the accent choices.

I don’t how to end this, so let’s steal from Rod Sterling (and possible Charles Beaumont).

They never found Charley Parkes, because the guard didn't tell them what he saw in the glass case. He knew what they'd say and he knew they'd be right, too, because seeing is not always believing, especially if what you see happens to be an odd corner of the Twilight Zone.

Saturday 16 March 2019

It Blows here.

The wind has knocked out the power five times and caused the lamp in the living room to blink on and off without knocking out anything else using a socket. It never completely went at night, was probably likely repairs for others. This was annoying as I had been going to make food the first time and the second time I had already turned the kettle on for the healthy feast of a podnoodle.

The wind also rearranges the garden. It felt that the wheelie bin should be next to the shed at the bottom. The garden keeps patches of grass and is slowly turning into a mudpit from the wind taking chucks out of it and the path Leia takes around it so often that she craved herself into the soil. Another creature likes to dig in the centre of the garden.

Pixie is an odd, half-feral thing that has decided to leave the kitchen and come back in the house, so now when I stay at my parents, I wake to her staring me now. Or sitting next to me. So now the bedroom cat also comes into the living room and sits in the window and they all growl at the kitten and Leia. Pixie is also roughly a ten year old cat.

I had already decided that the news gives me more amounts of frustration and annoyance, also anxiety attacks so I have stopped watching it activity but I can still hear it from the other room. Also twitter keeps me informed. They not much I can say, other than the world is horrible place, newspapers are truly sickeningly, company choose views over morals and advertisers should be more concerned over that. It would be nice to live in a world where Nazi were joke and not something that maybe Superman should go back to actively punching.

There's not much more I can say that other people haven't already said, other than I love you, with our differences and I want you to be safe. That someday we're go forward together.

Wednesday 13 March 2019

Book Review: Remember Me by D.E.White

Ava Cole, wanting to stay in Wales like a adult and not a seventeen year old.

Fifteen years ago Ellen Smith vanished from the woods near her small Welsh village. Never to be seen again.

Eight people were in the woods that night: eight splintered lives, eight people hiding a terrible secret. But who can remember the truth?

Now, Ellen’s best friend, Detective Ava Cole is all grown up back in the village where it all began, and everyone is asking the same question.

What really happened to Ellen?

Filled with shocking discoveries and traumatic memories this fast paced thriller is perfect for fans of Friend Request and Close to Home.

A woman originally from the states, moved to Wales as a kid, had a baby and left him there, went back to the states, the kid's dad is dying so she goes back and deals with the terrible thing they did in the woods. Then plot happens.

Everyone has this shared secret, this secret is also used to threaten Ava Cole by a person who has this secret also, so Ava Cole justifying her shitty behaviour with this was kinda dumb. Maybe if this character was introduced as being more spiteful than sense. The thing is the more you know about this whole situation, the more you're like: "hur, well you really were all the place at 17, Cole". Her actions are explained by having postpartum depression and not having a support group. A much of bad parenting happens in this book.

This book has two narrators, one the antagonist in first person and close follow third person of Ava Cole wandering around Wales, I know it was a specific area of Wales but I have terrible memory, and this was library book I no longer have. This works well, it wasn't frustrating obvious who the unknown narrator was but also you're able figured it out.

The audio book has single voice actor, she does a decent job, especially when she has to do Welsh, American and Southern English because Southern English is obvious the standard narrator voice we all must adopt (okay, I get the choice of using newsreader voice over fun accents for the narrating parts but I will still make unhelpful digs about it).

Overall, I give this book 4/5 stars for Reality TV. This feels like a set up for a series with Ava Cole investigating, but decided to start with the middle book of the series, where MC goes back to their roots after their first big mystery. This does appear to be D.E.White debut, but it's just the debut of the pen name, she writes as Daisy White. Not sure what I think of this if it is a series, maybe I would read the next one if it is the start of a series.

Saturday 9 March 2019

My Original Online Persona

I have decided to change my Twitter Bio. It's been a a bit squished for a while and outdated.

"Filmmaker & Online Content Creator. I also like to criticise things. I'm dyslexic, creative, autistic, Artistic, a writer,book&music lover and Despaired Student".

I don't know what to change it to. It's currently I like books. Well, actually it's "I like Film & Books, I try to make things and talk about things." I will change it later, I was motivated to do this as there's programme I'm going to apply to that has the horrifying question of "Do you have a twitter?" and "Do you have Instagram?"

I'm not partying all the time, but there's personal stuff on my twitter and probably buried in the Instagram captions (also stylist pictures of Whiskey and Pride Vodka), that might be used against me, but they also want Disabled people to apply. Nothing about the Queers (by the way, you should not refer to any group people as the "preferred term"s, this was a joke) Also raises questions about having your writing from your teen hood of being undiagnosed Autistic child struggling in school and with your identity as you went about not talking about your problems, even only referencing it on the internet.
but then again imagine if potential employee/place of study dug through your internet history like the tolls do. Though, if does make you major public figure maybe they should. But I only want to do weird internet jokes and behind the camera work. Let's be honest, no one cares about the camera person unless they got bored of harassing the cast.

I looked through old tweets briefly, it mostly cringely stuff but that I've had that thing since 2011 so of course. There's also stuff that put harshly, which I guess I should delete if I wanted to appear squeaky clean. Or trying to make a point but just like those dumb shame posts on Tumblr.
A lot of it's weird poetry which was definitely my thing in my teens: On 08/10/2011 19:36:50, "I lost myself in a moment and found myself again, in a lifetime of regret".
Also I've always been annoyed by TV channels/producers lying about their stakes in things.

I've always posted about about stupid my dogs are:On 17/10/2011 23:28:18 "I love my dog, but he's so stupid. He lies in the middle of my bed and on my art work. Then stares at me as though I've broke his heart."
The one awkward thing, On 27/10/2011 18:17:19 "Adolf Hitler is a lovely name for any child, born before 20th century." I mean I wasn't wrong, I don't why I didn't just stick to Adolf for the tweet. Also the 19th because people in the 20th still had to change their names after that. Not many people chose to live with either of those names. I might actually been watching something dealing with that.

Most were sad: on 08/11/2011 21:58:11 "With 13 years of school behind me, I can confirm it broke me. It unscrewed my screws and forgot to rebuild me in their image." School Shockley was not great time for a Younger carer that had Dyslexia, Autism and chronic pain issues.

I've only read 2011 tweets, maybe there's something horrifying lucking in later years. 

My YouTube also just comes up when you google my name. I share opinions there on films, not so much TV, I never got around to criticising Autistic TV shows that was my plan. I just feel weird that they so open about online Stalking you for something that's meant to be on screen thing. They have an info day that I'm going to go to.

Maybe I should just privatised everything and leave the internet to be hermit. There's a lot of these posts that end with my wish to disappear and only read books. Though, I no longer feel like doing it on a permanent basis. Maybe a week away.

On 2011-11-13 22:42:15 "I'm beautiful because I'm not perfect. Note to self: the same should apply to my art work/writing."
On 2011-11-27 14:44:02 "I don't want to fit your mode, if I have to break mine."

Wednesday 6 March 2019

Book Review: The Apple of My Eye by Claire Allan

Probably should question the note flung through your window.

Just how far is a mother willing to go?

When a mysterious note arrives for seven months pregnant nurse Eliana Hughes, she begins to doubt every aspect of her life – from her mixed feelings about motherhood to her marriage to Martin, who has become distant in recent months.

As the person behind the note escalates their campaign to out Eli’s husband as a cheat, she finds herself unable to trust even her own instincts, and as pressure builds, she makes a mistake that jeopardises her entire future.

Elsewhere, someone is watching. Someone who desperately wants a baby to call their own and will go to any lengths to become a mother – and stay a mother…

A lot of this book revolves these notes that just say stuff and Eli takes them as gospel without prove. She pregnant and therefore really vulnerable but she doesn't question them. Maybe if they relationship being in a bad place was established before the letters started arriving. Even with the slight Gaslighting she gets, I think it would worked better if the start of the trouble was dragged out more. This is on the short side for Thrillers, so maybe just little more time might have been better. I guess it's actually minor to the story.

The novel has three POVs first person narration, including the main character Eli and a mystery stalker. This works well for the story, I mean I knew what going going to happened by chapter three. I had doubts along the way that it was a red herring, but I knew it probably wasn't.

The plot worked well. It's a thriller so it's meant to have twists, they work fine. I never know what say about Twists because I always guess them. I'm more here for the execution.

The characters are okay, they their parts okay, it's hard not to get frustrated by Eli sometimes. Mostly never questioning the notes, especially when no one would have motive to send one of the notes if they were fully true.

I listened to this on Audiobook and the Irish accents were delightful in the way ya get sick of English being the standard for British books. Besides personal taste they were fine.

Overall, I gave this 4/5 stars for Baby Bumps. The story was pretty obvious for me, but I enjoy the process.

Saturday 2 March 2019

Solving Mysteries with Online Dating.

Back again, back again with nothing but nonsense. I haven't done anything this week. I'm meant to be running a readathon but I keep falling asleep. 

All my creative thoughts are about some fanfict nonsense that no one would be interested in even if I did take the time to write it out. I just have to do stuff. I did go to IKEA and built a wardrobe. That's something. It's also right now sitting empty. I'm been in my house for over year now and It's still a mess with boxes, my bookshelves ain't even properly organised but that is me. Family stuff, things are somewhat peaceful, but my internet still somehow doesn't work. It must be the router somehow.

I want to get back to excersing and the editing, the writing, the reviewing, the reading of books I want to read. I could lie and say I'm going to do all that stuff but the truth is I'm going to solve the StrangerVille mystery and my sims is going to join the army and hack into everything. What I am going to with my life? Who knows?

The online dating thing has became quite disillusion, so my profile currently includes this as what I'm looking for:

A very specific DisneyWorld park joke, but I do wonder when Buzzy will reveal himself. Maybe I go back to it and take this weird joke or maybe I'll find my soulmate with it. I was tempted to just message everyone if they knew where Buzzy was to see if anyone would understand, then maybe they would understand me.

Wednesday 27 February 2019

Book Review: House Swap by Rebecca Fleet

We going to have an accidental theme.

‘No one lives this way unless they want to hide something.’ 

When Caroline and Francis receive an offer to house swap, they jump at the chance for a week away from home. After the difficulties of the past few years, they’ve worked hard to rebuild their marriage for their son’s sake; now they want to reconnect as a couple.

On arrival, they find a house that is stark and sinister in its emptiness – it’s hard to imagine what kind of person lives here. Then, gradually, Caroline begins to uncover some signs of life – signs of her life. The flowers in the bathroom or the music in the CD player might seem innocent to her husband but to her they are anything but. It seems the person they have swapped with is someone she used to know; someone she’s desperate to leave in her past.

But that person is now in her home – and they want to make sure she’ll never forget . . .

This book is sadly not really a thriller, it tries to have a twist but especially doesn't work and with the audiobook production I was more annoyed than anything. It mostly dances around the facts of the story, or things that they no reason to dance around other than laziness and to drag this thing out.

The characters are very bland, they work in marketing kinda bland (they might not work in marketing, it just reference to obsession with marketing as a job in film. I don't know what they work as). I think this lacking important thriller elements as well as the characters not having much development. I guess we're meant to feel sorry for them, but I don't know who they're meant to be. 

The audiobook performance was fine, not sure why they decided to spend the money on four narrators for this book. Frankly, it would have worked better with just one, with the dumb twist. It's probably OMG moment when the narrators switch but as soon as the POV was introduce it was clearly not going to be who she thinks it is, otherwise they couldn't market this as Thriller. 

This book does have Thriller elements, like an obvious mystery that you know will be solved as soon as you know what terrible secret the MC has, so it's not thrilling at all. There's also the Husband's mystery drug problem, that he started because of stress, so it is a prescribed drug. I know it's not antidepressants but imagining it was and his wife was just being an arse about him still taking it, it would really fitted with this book. It's never stated so feels very McGuffin. I guess it's a sleeping pill, he's a therapist, so maybe he's meant to have self-prescribed them but that would be a scandal on it's own. 

If this is not a Thriller what genre is it? I guess Drama, or just fiction for what it would be market in bookstore or library. The idea of that's promised on the back is a Thriller, but its more about petty relationships. Most of the relationships were sex scenes: have an affair and it's love because the sex is good. I'm Ace so if this meant to have been some great love story with tragic ending, it's okay if you say so. The one time it goes to back to a thriller, it sways away again. I got really excited that something was going to happen but then it didn't so back to petty nonsense. 

Overall, I gave this book 2/5 stars for Dead Hamsters. If want something that's actually a thriller then go for You Let Me In (I will review this book soon, I read it first and probably should have review it that way.). It's actually a thriller and I didn't question not finishing it. It has a similar feature of someone renting their House to someone while they away.