2019 Goals

Back again, once again, here we are again.

Okay, let's get into my hopes and dreams. I'm trying to be realistic with goals and I know January is not going to be a good starting month for anything due to family members going to have surgery and will have recovery times. It's going to be stressful, by the time you have read this the surgery will have happened. So let's get into the goals:

1. Read a book a week: This one is straight forward. 
2. Finish 12 series: Okay, I would be happy with five because that's more than last year. I keep buying full series and then I don't read them because go me. I need to actually finish series, though it's hard when authors often randomly bring more books later in the series.
3. Read More of My Own Books: So I read 34 of my own books this year, having read 120, I would like that number to be higher. I think ideally what I read should be from half my books. 
4. Stop with the Insane Book Buying: I feel like I should ban books until I finish editing the book hauls I have lol. It's not about book hauls, it's just I buy a lot and don't read a lot of them. I would like to more read books than unread books.
5. Write a Review a Week: Straight forward, share my thoughts on a book or film. Probably mostly books.
6. Write a Post a Week: Having a self imposed deadline I think would help me, it did in the past, but it's keep slipping away from me so easily. I guess I'm more self-conscious about writing.
7. Write More in General: I guess I want to actually work on a novel. I have ideas and it's still something I would like to do. 
8. Published a Video a Week: Not sure if I should put this as two weeks as that would be more realistic, but I want a better scheduled for myself. I just have to edit things through again. I also know that this will be a fail in the first two weeks of the year due to a session of family surgery, the family who go through surgery together stay together. I'm not having surgery, it's other two other family members this time but obvious stressful and have to do stuff in preparation and it won't be great environment to get anything filmed or edited probably. 
9. Do More Complicated Videos: I think part of the problem is that I'm bored just doing standard BookTube videos and should actually follow through with ideas. I'm sitting on two ideas with two series I still want to do. I just need do stuff.
10. Continue Bullet Journaling: I like the process and tracking how many pages of a book I've read that day and my process of actually doing stuff. 
11. Exercise Most Days: I'm going to try and exercise at least 20 minutes everyday, this is me trying to create new and healthy behaviour. Sometimes I might not time or have a major flare ups meaning I can't do much, so will have to save my energy for just moving around the house. I want to become fitter and honestly lose weight in the hope that make me feel better. It won't solve my issues, part of the reason I've struggled with exercise routines is because of fails up. Another big problem is not finding a exercise that works for me. I can't do jogging because the cold air makes me immediately out of breath (thanks asthma) and I feel awkward doing that. I don't like team supports and strict times don't work for me. I would join a gym if there was one than ten minutes away. I brought exercise bike, I know I need more methods of exercise than that, but it's a good start. 
12. Apply for things: I want to go to college or get in a training programme. I've had two years on the sidelines and it's getting me nowhere so I'm going to actually finish Application forms. The family thing has finally happened so time to do things. I'm still tore but let's me more involved in the universe.

If I actually do the last goal, I wouldn't mind letting other thing slide. Like I said, January is not the best month to start anything, there will be messed ups and that's okay. I think the important of goals is just keep going. I will hopefully see you next week, because life is busy.

Dizzy Filming

Remember, when I said I would have the first installment of a novel on here. Yeah, I never thought that through. I have been making a "film" this whole week and have not had much time to sit and write. I do have much time today either as I decided to film as I have not filmed the videos I should have this week. Also I'm doing Video Every day in August (VEDA). It not had a good start.

I updated my laptop to Windows 10 so my mouse reverse it's buttons and my video editor wouldn't start. I updated and reinstalled it for no reason as it turn out all I had to do was disable my graphics card to get to come on. However, I wasted tons of time doing that meaning I am going to be late doing VEDA on the first day so already a fail. My laptop hates me. I don't know shy BatSignal hates me so much. I mean I'm getting a new laptop and I am still planning to take it to Uni with me, because my love for it is too strong.

The filming process was interesting but problematic as always. It was a bit boring this time, especially as I never end up in the film at all this time. This probably a good thing as I always panic when on scene and I'm not in charge. I ended up on the floor again and I wished I had did the footage better and gave more direction. I started feeling dizzy so that my excuse for messing it up. We also had a homemade boom. I don't think it was worth as it ruined a lot of footage and most of the dialogue is going to have to be dubbed due to filming outside and in a large hall so echoing.

We edit it most of it, but it was slow process and a certain scene is going to be a nightmare to make look okay. I'm glad that I'm not in charge of that.

Anyway, I am now fleeing this scene to edit and trying to finish my current reads before the BookTube-a-thon starts on Monday. Write next time.

Hiding in the Camp Woods

I am a failure as a writer and I have fallen behind in Camp NaNoWriMo. I am so much a failure that I almost completely forgot about this post and this will probably the most I write today. I'm in behind in my book commits to myself. My reading has fallen behind and I actually forgot about Wednesday till it was 2pm and I was in a public garden. I only have one written waiting in the wings incase I degert to read review book that week. I have three other Netgalley books that I read and for some reason never got around to reviewing that I could write a small review about. However, the pass three weeks have had pre-written reviews go up and I don't like that, even if one of those was from forgetting to change the scheduled date.

I was planning to finish one of the two short stories I started but that was totally not happening. The latest one is turning into a novelle and a series. The first one has lost it spark but I'm determine to finish a least one thing in this month and I will share it with you or maybe I'll just give you chapter two to Video store or chapter six for some reason. I have apparently wrote nothing today which just great.

I have finished reading "A Court of Thorns and Roses" by Sarah J. Maas, that's going to get a review but not sure I can put that up next week or not as some people like two weeks and others three before a review goes up but then again I also now have the physical copy of it that I brought from Waterstones so it's probably going up next week. I spent way too much time this morning trying to take a good selfie with it.

 I have nothing else to say so I'm off to waste time staring at random things on the internet instead of doing anything even close to productive.

Wasps on Set.

They're never know. Shit, I told you.

You can turn part of a stage into a bed and just hope the audience doesn't noticed that there is clearly no  mattress under the duvey or sees the wood behind the pillows.

I spent most of this week on a film set of sorts. It's been interesting, especially being the oldest person in the Young Film Club.

Monday was petty boring as I wasn't in any scenes and didn't get to do any of the filming. We gained two people. We lost someone, only had someone that day and we were informed that we were only going to have one of the main character's actor for two days. We now randomly have actual actor in the film. He's been Doctor Who and everything so I'm amused. we also filmed outside without a tripod that we could attach the camera to. Locations included: outside of high school having work done (strange dust was coming from the roof); a graveyard and turning a meeting room into a class room. I also lay on the floor to film people's feet.

Tuesday, I had my first awkward experience of being in front of the camera. I could hear my accent getting stronger for some reason and said a line three times, a different way each time. I prefer being behind the camera, unless it's my camera. We went up to the woods that day which was not a fun experience. My legs hurt with all my walking last week. I kinda stopped that whilst we were filming. I brought my own tripod with me so we could have steady shot fun.

Wednesday was more wood fun but now haunted dolls. I did one of the dolls make up and it indeed sucked..You think I have began to be good after all this time of painting weird things on my face. I was a lot more gentle than others with putting make-up on. I did the last of my shooting that day which was interesting.

Thursday was not a productive day. We made a fake bed and set up a kitchen scene in a town hall but the needed actor never arrived so we had used body doubles for the bedroom scenes, hopefully the audience will see what we wanted them to see. We did some editing, I did most of it with quite a quick pace so by the end of that day we had a whole scene of footage edited, which gave us three minutes and we had another minute edited from an another day so we have four whole minutes edited. Though, there might be changes made to what's been edited. For example, someone in the background looks up and smiles into the camera. We might get away with it but I'll know.  Today was also the only day where I brought the case for the tripod, it would have been helpfully on the days we walked up to the woods. Lots of wasps after us and everyone that day.  My age was also reveal and I was the only only adult on set (that day, there's a 17 year old involved) besides the gun running the thing.

 So that wrap on my part of the filming of the film, there is still addiction footage and two scenes to be filmed. There meant to be editing sessions happening and said I would help with that. Not sure why considering I hate editing and I have a massive pile of footage of my own I should really get around to editing. All good for the personal statement and that.

I'm off now to wander around Edinburgh and meet authors.

Wordy Slumps: Writing, Reading, VIdeo making.

I feel like writing, but nothing is coming to me as I try. I'm meant to doing Camp NaNoWriMo this month but that been a complete fail. I'm probably only wrote slightly over 1000 words creatively so far this month and there is only four days left.

This blog been slacking as well, I've been cheating with the dates as well. Reviews as well as the post. I just been struggling to write anything and figure out the way I want to write. Plots there, but I'm never happy with the words when I finally to get any out.

I'm kinda back on reading, but I hadn't actually reading that much since college stopped. I did the BookTube-a-Thon and managed to do all the challenges including reading 2166 pages. However, I just didn't want to read after the week till Friday, I needed a five day break.

I'm also meant to be doing VEDJ (Video Every Day in July) but that has failed past week. I've filmed two videos repeatedly but all the takes were shit, so never even started editing it. 

I've also done no drawing, I want to draw petty things like boys, men kissing. 

Also no job, not even jobs that there any point applying to because dear children, most jobs when you have no proper training/experince/driving lisence required you to talk and as you all know talking is not something I do. Speaking to a camra, yes, but not so much to people. 

Life is not fun when you're unemployed, no clue as why anyone likes this. Sure, you don't have to leave your bed but its gets rather pointless.

I'm going to see about voluntering, basically not leaving the house for a month is enough of nothing. I need the experince as well you know helping people and it important to do good stuff. I don't properly give money to charity, I sometimes buy books from charity shops for a little more than there worth in present condition but that still me getting something from it. So yeah, help the world and that. 

I'm off to hopefully get some reading done. By the Bye, the Wednesday review isn't likely to be every week as I'm not as reading as much but reviews will now only appear on Wednesdays when they do appear here. See you lot next week.

Freedom to be Busy with things of my choising (Summer plans)

I'm rather tired at the moment, I went into Dumf (Home of Escaping) on the purpose of getting food out of Marks & Spencer to last me while my parents away next week. Very excitingly my sister and I will have the house to ourselves for a full week and since neither of us know how to drive we will basically won't be able to leave the house.

I also got a dress that's slightly too big and went to the Indian which was good. I'm almost tempted to end this post here instead of writing my tended stuff such as being finally done with college (at least for the summer) and now I can do all that stuff I've been despeaate to do but I have been putting off due to my college and feeling terrible. First plans are to tidy my room, reorganise my clothes and then my books. My room always needs tidying, I currently have limited access to my clothes and my bookcase have been buging for months due to read series not being together and them generally lukering about.

I'm also planning to catch up with my comic books as well as put a dent in my owned to be read list and do some creative stuff. Just basically all the stuff I've been wanting to do but have had to put off in favour of college.

I also have some big video plans that I'll discuss on my vlog/booktube channel tomorrow. I've recenty brought a memory card that allows me to film for over 160 minutes on it which is awesome and  bought a tripod this week. A big one thats taller than me, unlike the tiny one my mum brought off ebay.

Its not the fact it was off ebay that makes it bad, it just that literally too small have any practical use in filming videos. However, I think it makes a good stress relief toy so it might be good for editing.

With that note I leave you for bed where I'll have sweet dreams of book ideas.